Once and Again
by Pinboo
Summary: FINAL CHAPTER UP. ET. Their ever perfect marriage was crumbling down,, then, some magic got its part and dragged them back to the time 4 years ago just before this all started. Do they got to reexperience friendship, mixed emotions, and just perhaps love?
1. Case Unresolved

Disclaimer : I don't own CCS.

A/n: Finally… an ET fic… Do enjoy…

**Once and Again**

.Chapter 1 – Case Unresolved.

"…She never stops whining or complaining. And she practically annoys me every time. It's as if I've never done anything right for –"

"Oh come on! You truly have never done any damn thing for right!"

"See what I meant?"

The 28-year-old Hiiragizawa Eriol stared at the couples' quarrel in front of him. That day's task was to find a marriage solution for the Kitamura couple. Or to find a peacemaker. Or actually, anything would be good as long as they would stop sending killing signals to each other.

"Mrs. Kitamura, it would be best if you let your husband finish his words. I can give extra 5 minutes from our counseling session for you to spill it all out… later," Eriol said. Not the most professional solution, yes, but he just needed to stop hearing her voice for that moment.

"Mr. Hiiragizawa, at this point, 5 minutes won't ever be enough for me to ever let all my nerves for this dear husband of mine subside," Saki Kitamura spoke calmly to the marriage consultant. Yet the same dangerous aura could be sensed in each word.

Eriol cleared his throat and then turned to the Kitamura man and told him to continue.

Ryuutaro Kitamura's confession started once more. And that time it took only 2 ½ minutes before Saki Kitamura took place in the conversation again. This time, Eriol didn't try to bring peace between the two. Hearing the never-ending screeches of the marriage problem case number #5: The demanding wife, the unreliable husband, Eriol truly felt regret of accepting the case. And even if the Kitamura wanted their money back, he would gladly give it –just as long as he could escape his office. Certainly he wasn't in the mood for work at then.

For the umpteenth time ever since he took this marriages consultant career, he wondered why he had ever agreed to take the job. Sure, being the owner of the country's top consulting firm and the praised marriage consultant himself, money flowed into his account easily. But it wasn't like he ever needed _more_ money. He guessed it was just simply because he always had this strange attraction to problems. Be it his problems, or other peoples' ones. Oh yes, and he always had loved to other peoples' affair, hadn't he? Since all those old card capturing days and such, he was such the problem' meddlers.

The Kitamuras were still arguing at each other. Again, the Clow's incarnation let them spent more minutes of that 2 hours session.

Yes, he knew he didn't give his 100 performances for this couple's case, but it wasn't as if he was signed to handle this problem at first. It was actually his colleague's case, but the Kitamura –those damned couple, yes – personally asked and _demanded_, that their consultant must be the best all throughout the company. Well, costumers werw the real bosses, so Eriol gave the unlikely luxury for them.

"Aaargh! You damn son of a BCH! Why did I ever agree to marry you!" the roar of the Kitamura woman got him back to situation.

Eriol sighed as he glanced at his watch.

The session wouldn't end until the next nice 97 minutes.

_I hate this job_, he grunted mentally.

----------

"These are all?" Tomoyo said put down the box on the ground outside.

A young man with dark brown hair followed her action and replied, "For today. I shall take care of the rest tomorrow. Geez, never thought that moving out would be this complicated,"

"Duh, sure it would. London is across the continents and definitely this won't be like moving out to your apartment's upper level," the raven haired beauty commented before she took another gulp of her sodas.

"I hate this moving-out thing," grunted the man –Kaze. "I hate these troublesome things."

"Well, surely it won't be troublesome once you're there. Geez… I always love London,"

"… Then you should just come and move in with me,"

Tomoyo sighed. "Don't bring that subject again, Kaze."

"What? You're the one who bring it up first," he defended as sitting up on the ground beside her. No one spoke for some minutes, until Kaze broke it. "It's still a 'no', then?"

The heiress stared at this guy, Araide Kaze. He was a young man in his late twenties, an attractive one indeed –with his tall figure, stylishly-cut dark brown hair, and clear jade eyes. A guy with the best sarcasm humor Tomoyo had ever encountered and the same moody guy who could turn into the world's sweetest guy in an action. He was her mentor, her motivator, her best guy friend…

Her love.

"…Ne, Tomoyo?"

She blinked. "Huh? Sorry, what was it again?"

Kaze rolled his eyes, definitely not pleased having to repeat his words again. "Will you go and stay with me in London?"

His gaze was stern and demanding, but she still could see beneath those emerald gems eyes, that there was still the expectation and childish hope. It was the expression that she just hated to disappoint the most.

She sighed, clearly didn't like the idea of having this same question that he had asked her for the past few months. "I can't Kaze. I have obligations here in Japan. What about my job? And the Daidouji company?"

"Tomoyo… don't lie to yourself. You hate your job. And about the Daidouji company… you still can run in even when you're in England. Besides, just how many job opportunities you've been offered? International multibillion-asset companies were practically begging you to join them, and _you_, you damn woman, just declined them as if they were mere rubbish. Believe me, dear friend. In London, Los Angles, even in Namibia, companies will fall in line and pleading you to be their part,"

She blushed a little at his praise. "Well…my friends –"

"Sakura and Syaoran are in Hongkong, and you're not really close to Chiharu and the others too. You don't have anyone to lose,"

_He was right_, she thought a rather pissed out. He was her only friends ever since college.

"But I still have… him," she smiled bitterly.

This was when Kaze's face darkened. "…Don't tell me you're actually considering _that_ guy?"

"W-well, he's my –"

"Husband, yes, sadly. One that never does care about his own wife."

"I-It's not always like that. You make him sounds like a mean g –"  
He unconsciously cut her sentences. "I… won't ever hurt you like what he did, Tomoyo. I'll make you happy, I'll cherish, and love you, and…"

Her heart wrenched at this.

"Well, what are you suggesting me to do? Getting a divorce from him and marry you?"

His green eyes pierced her purple ones. "…He doesn't love you. And truly, Tomoyo, you've been wasting your time for someone who doesn't even deserve an inch of your consideration! I bet that even now when we're discussing him, he is actually with that damn whor –"

"Kaze, don't talk about her _or_ him that way,"

"Tch. Why defend him? You don't even love him."

"I don't," she stated. "But he's my husband, and I hope you can respect him more." The Araide guy snorted and was probably aiming for other insults to his best friend's husband, when the best friend herself spoke again, "Then again… it's not about love. It's never about it."

Kaze looked up at the now stoic friend.

"Both of you've realized it and yet still… God, I don't know why you two keep torturing yourselves,"

Her smile then was a sarcastic one. "Stupid, isn't it?"

"Aa… stupid it is,"

-----------

"You're late,"

"Sorry Kaho. Works. Damn ones," replied Eriol as he kissed the red-haired woman. "How was your trip?"

"Well… so-so. But you won't believe this! I've found this _Fendi_ bag with a very reasonable price! Gorgeous, isn't it?" Mizuki Kaho exclaimed as she showed him her new bag.

"Of course," he murmured as he kissed her again. "I miss you,"

"Don't worry," she said in low seductive tone as she pulled him down. "You're not the only one,"

---------

The mansion was dimly-lit when he returned back home later that night. He guessed it wasn't unexpected, the clock had showed the time of nearing 2 AM though. Sighing, Eriol then put his brief case on the nearest chair and started to head his way to his bedroom.

He was about to open the door, but the sobs he heard coming from inside prevented him to. The need to see and check up what was happening was almost pointless. Eriol knew that it was Tomoyo who was crying, and it didn't take him his ability to read minds to know the clause.

No, it was not because of him. He had hurt her for way too long that her tears must have dried up. And besides, he would never deserve her crying for him. Not in a million years, not forever.

But someone did deserve it, as it seemed.

Someone, Eriol knew, who was dear in her heart. Had been and perhaps always would have:

Araide Kaze.

And though being her lawfully husband, he didn't really gave the damn or even had the rights to decide whom his wife should truly loved. The same went for Tomoyo to Eriol. The unspoken rules to never mind your marriage's partner problem.

And the routine had gone for 4 years now.

The Hiiragizawa couple, married at the young age of 24. And though they weren't blessed with kids yet, people always looked up at them as the image of the ever perfect pair. Loving, caring, respecting each other well…or at least that was what people would see and/or _expect _from such a couple.

Her sobs soon faded, and he guessed that she must have cried herself to sleep. After quickly debating himself whether to go and check her or not, he settled for the first option and slowly opened the door.

He was right. She did fell asleep on her sitting position on the floor.

Eriol approached her, and took the notice of this woman with tangled hair and left tears' strain on her cheeks. She was still in her working suit –and being the stylish magazine's editor-in-chief, monotonous colors were rarely found on her daily outfits. But then again, the bright dress she wore couldn't help to bring out the sadness over herself. Tomoyo was on one of her worst condition ever to be seen.

Bending down beside her, gently she shook her. "You may catch the cold if you sleep on the floor, Tomoyo. Get up and sleep on your bed." She didn't move. _Overly exhausted_, he reasoned. Working on a fast-growing magazine and keep maintaining her inherited toy company must have made her reached her limit. Eriol just wondered why she hadn't hit it any time sooner. Sighing, tenderly he picked her up and tucked her inside the warm blanket on the bed.

She was quite a sleeper –one that couldn't sleep still on the same spot at times like this, he concluded as fixing bigger pillows by her side to prevent her from falling to the floor. Tomoyo turned back on her sleep again, before finally stopping and just slept in static manner.

Sitting on her bed, he watched at his wife with the ever same expression that he felt most often towards her: guilt –always guilt. And then he muttered the thing that could kind of considered as a customary then.

"…I'm sorry,"

He was disgusted with himself. He had said those words repeatedly every night, yet, the very next day, he would act as if they were never a couple and enjoyed his affair instead.

True, their marriage was never one based on love, or even the slightest crush. The marriage itself was there because of the pleading ask of the dying Sonomi Daidouji, who wanted to make sure her sole daughter married to the right man and be safe by his side.

The choice had fallen into the Hiiragizawa bachelor, back then.

_Wrong choice_, he decided as getting up and walked to his dressers and changed for his t-shirt and boxers. And as he took the place on the bed beside Tomoyo, his thoughts somehow went to his job… and felt the irony in it. He was titled as the no.1 consultant all over the country, had won many awards for his job as the marriage consultant –so many that he, for real, had his own cabinet to keep all the trophies and award certificates –, had been trusted to be the consultant of uncountable mount of important peoples, and many other great things.

But then again, the best doctor didn't mean that he was free from all illnesses; the best teacher didn't mean he knew all things in this world.

And thus, being the best marriage consultant didn't mean he was free from any kind of marriage problems.

His own 4-year-old marriage was the case that he had never been able to solve, though.

TBC…

A/n: This is my honest confession: Really, I've worked on this story even when I'm still writing 'Chameleon'. It's been a long time ago, yet somehow I always change and change the versions. There was this version with Tomoyo and Eriol with total opposite personalities, or that they were always arguing at each other, or another one with a son, or one that they were sent back to their highschool (and even in that highschool arc. That there are still many many different versions), about the different version of Kaze, and so on… yadayada. I don't know why the choice finally fall into this version.

Anyway, sorry for the kinda gloomy chapter, yes, I need it to explain some few backgrounds. But the next following chapters will have more grooves and twists, it's when Time and Magic play their roles…


	2. End it Back

Disclaimer: I don't own CCS

Italics are flashbacks, and bolds are thoughts.

**Once and Again**

.Chapter 2. End it Back

It was one Sunday afternoon when those noises were heard from the Hiiragizawa Manor.

"Yes Ruby! Go and catch him! I'll get the cookies and we'll feed him right away!" the yellow plush doll look-a-like flied as giving his commandos to his Moon Guardian acquaintance.

"Sir yes sir! Ruby is on the way!" Nakuru lifted her hand and did the military salute as she dashed.

The scene that was currently happening was the attempt of putting down the huge manor into a breakdown. Spinel's feeding time seemed to be such the logical reason.

"Damn you two!" The poor Spinel was practically screaming as his wings helped him rushed towards each room with Nakuru and Keroberos trailing not too far after. It had been bad enough that Nakuru tried to feed him sweets, but now that damn Keroberos brat too? Life couldn't be crueler.

Taking an abrupt turn at the L-shaped rooms, the sight of the other -definitely calmer- moon guardian came into view. And as much as Spinel hated to show weakness in front of the Clow's former guardian, the two Satan that trailed just meters behind made that an exception.

Oh, he wouldn't practically yelled 'Yue! Help!' but _showed_ him instead that he needed help –and hoped (yes, what else could he do?) that Sakura's Moon Guardian would noticed and _cared_ for the fact of SOS alarm.

Either Yue was too ignorant, or he simply didn't care, or he actually enjoyed the show where the later-created sun guardian would be found totally helpless, he just stood there unaffected with arms crossing in front of his chest as the other three 'played' tag.

"Such a view, isn't it?"

Without turning his head to his right where the voice came from, Yue replied his former master's wife slash current mistress' best friend. "A view indeed," Spoken Yue with the flattest tone Tomoyo had ever heard that she couldn't really place whether it was his sarcasm or plainly his humor.

"…If I may ask, Mistress, what is going on?"

"Hmm? What do you mean?"

"Is there something you and Master want to tell us?"

"What makes you think so?" she asked back with the smiling face.

"I could sense it, Mistress. Something's not right. And thought not shown, those 3 nuts could also feel it,"

**_As expected from a Clow guardian_**, Tomoyo thought. _**Very sensitive if it was concerning his master**._ She had this thought that if Yue could be more aware of someone's feeling towards him, then he wouldn't need to look that gloomy. Tomoyo's knowing gaze then fell to the other moon guardian –who still stole glances at him while chasing her partner.

Tomoyo smiled an unreadable smile and then said, "Anyway, would the four of you like to enjoy the tea with me and Eriol at the patio?"

-----------

"Master! Master! Look what I've found! It's the key! Your key!" Nakuru gleamed happily as she showed the Sun key to Eriol. "Ooh… and I thought I'd never see it again!" she said referring to some random memories where she played along with the key and lost2 it.

Of course, there was no such lost things case in Eriol's life for he could easily flick his finger and the so-called lost object would appear out of nowhere. Some objects, as it seemed for him, were better remained forgotten or lost. But it wasn't a problem anymore, and not wanting to ruin the pride on Nakuru's face, he accepted the key… to just put it on the table and not touching it anymore. Nakuru pretended not to notice this. His master seemed a bit dazed that day though.

"Enjoy the cake, Kero-chan?" Tomoyo asked as she took place on the available chair beside her husband.

"As always," Kero replied through muffled mouth. "Anyway, what is it that makes you two called for the four of us?"

Tomoyo put down her tea cup and looked gently at the four magical creatures in front of her. "Well we just thought that of all people the four of you deserved to be the first ones to know this. Especially since Sakura-chan and Syaoran-san are still in Hongkong and … "

Eriol didn't keep the track on what Tomoyo said later on. His sapphire eyes gazed weakly to the thin air.

Yes, they had made the decision.

He wasn't quite sure what gave him (and her, supposedly) the _sudden_ idea to talk about it. It was the day before, Saturday evening at the Hiiragizawa Manor, with the couple and no such other things to do. He could remember that they were in the kitchen, with him drinking black coffee while she was with her favorite ginger milk tea. The subject had been just put up at the surface like it was a talk about weather or what.

_"It had been 4 years," Eriol remembered his start._

_"Yes. 4 years," Tomoyo echoed._

_And then the speech just ran wildly from his tongue without him really thinking about it. It was almost as if his heart had the role to talk at then. He poured all that he had thoughts. Him being a jerk all this time, and how he truly had disappointed and hurt her, how she didn't deserve his acts towards her, how she would have been in a happier state if only she could be with other man…_

_She had her apologies all the time being when he talked. Blaming herself, telling him that it wasn't his fault, regretting that he had been too kind for his own good –for accepting the arranged marriage, and what she would claim as his source of unhappiness._

_None had shown the slightest emotions except for guilt towards each other._

_For the first time in 4 years of discreet marriage, they were being honest._

"Ma-Master? Is that true what Mistress was saying?" Nakuru's voice dragged him back to reality.

Slightly glancing at Tomoyo, who was then silent, he knew immediately that she had told them their decision.

"Is that true…?" Nakuru repeated. Her voice was closing to a whisper.

It was quite hard to say it…

"Master?" It was then Yue's.

Eriol finally nodded. "… Yes. Tomoyo and I have decided to get a divorce,"

What he felt next was truly unexpected.

The abrupt white light shone brightly and then it drastically turned into black. The next moment the black and white changed every second or so, it was as if being inside of a monochrome kaleidoscope. A strong wind was blown up at him and he suddenly heard noises, distant yet so near. The great turbulence was making him feel dizzy and he couldn't find himself to say any magical chant to bring the situation back to normal. He could faintly see Spinel's panther claw tried to reach for him, but the attempt was put into vain, as he felt all his senses went numb and like a powerful magic had pulled him away…

Pitch blankness, a loud thud, and later Eriol lost his consciousness.

----------------

She felt cold –freezing, almost. Rubbing her toes together, Tomoyo tried to get herself warmer. Oh, but it was too damn cold… it was as if like…

"Wake up! Wake up! Tomoyoo-chaan!"

She heard the sudden noise her consciousness started to gather, –quicker when she felt the sudden weight on her legs. Muffled out a displeased groan, she rolled around her body and opened her eyes to see the ever-smiling Sakura.

"Sa-Sakura?" she tried to get away her sleepiness. "You're back? When did you arrive?" Tomoyo asked as straightening up to a sitting position.

"Eh? Back? From where?" asked the Card Mistress.

"Hongkong?"

"Hmm? What did I do in Hongkong?"

"Sakura… You went there after you and Syaoran-san got married right?"

The sudden loud-pitched yell almost deafened her ears.

"HOEE! Me and Syaoran-kun! Married!" the blush appeared quickly on Sakura's creamy cheeks. "W-well, i-it's right that we want to get married…b-but God, not until Syaoran got his medical degree! A-And we're not t-that ready, a-and… well…we're definitely not married…"

"What are you talking about? Of course you are. Syaoran is your husband,"

"HOEE! I-Iie, Tomoyo-chan!"

Tomoyo's brows furrowed. "You're not married?"

"NO!"

Sakura was never one to lie. And her blushes were real too. The tiredness was wiped out of Tomoyo's senses. And for the first time, she took a gaze at her surroundings.

Whoa.

"W-why am I here?" she mumbled in shock.

It was her old bedroom in the Daidouji Manor where she occupied before she got married to Eriol.

**_B-but that couldn't be it! After Okaa-san passed away, I immediately sold the house a-and… Wait… don't tell me…_**

****Rapidly, Tomoyo jerked off her bed –making Sakura almost fell from because of her hastiness – and ran out of her room.

The view that greeted her made her knees felt –physically – weak.

The same long corridor, same high windows, same paintings on the wall… the right things in the exact same position as her old house…

"Ah, you finally wake up! Prepare yourself quick! We're going to meet the Akihara-san in an hour,"

That voice…

Tomoyo turned around, and there, stood the woman whom she thought she would never ever see again.

The ever great Sonomi Daidouji.

Her _supposedly_ dead mother.

Couldn't find anything to say, Tomoyo was totally speechless. Motionless wouldn't be an over statement too. Her mind went blank for a couple of minutes. And the next seconds, memories rushed into her suddenly-felt-so-small mind. Her mother dying wish, her mother last moment, her mother's smile, her mother's funeral, her mother…

Her mother's death.

"You're sweating, honey! Are you alright?"

Tomoyo almost jerked away when she felt her mother's warm hand touching her forehead.

**_This doesn't feel like a dream_**, and as she thought so, Tomoyo silently bite her tongue –checking whether it hurt or not. **_Ouch. It hurts. _**Damn… not a dream, as it seemed.

"Tomoyo-chan? Are you sick?" Sakura's voice went unnoticed

…But then… why?

She tried to remember whatever reason that could have the possibility to get her in this situation. Lights, winds, what else? Oh yes, she lost consciousness afterwards. Apparently, whatever happened during that time she was unaware, she was dragged back to her past and…

God, How on earth could she be dragged back to her past?

There was no such logical way…

Unless…

Clow.

Of course, how could she forget? Her childhood time wasn't the ordinary one. She was befriended with the chosen Card Captor, and heck, the once-strongest sorcerer ever was her husband! It was too ignorant if she ever thought she could be totally free from all this…this…

Eriol. He must have known something. She got to meet him and –

She suddenly felt someone held her wrist.

Sonomi looked gladly at her soon-to-be son-in-law. "E-Eriol! You're so early! Aren't you –"

"My deepest apology for my rudeness, Daidouji-sama, but I must inquire a private talk with Tomoyo at this right moment,"

"Eh? S-sure, you may and –"

Before Sonomi could finish her words, Eriol had managed to pull Tomoyo away to the corner, out of her mother and Sakura's hearing reach. The two women were understanding enough though, as they decided to leave and gave the privacy.

"What is going on?" Tomoyo asked immediately, having a positive feeling that he could provide her the information.

Eriol let go of her wrist and tried to calm his ragging breath. It seemed as if he was taking a race to get here.

"We-we're dragged back to our past, right?" she asked when he didn't say anything.

He nodded.

"H-how? Is it because of the Clow Cards? O-or some evil magical spell, or a curse, or what?"

"I don't know, Tomoyo. Haven't really had a research for it. I just tried to get to you as fast as possible, for I had a feeling that you were dragged back to the past too,"

Hearing that, she somehow had the urge to say gratitude, so yes, she said, "Thank you," though a little bit awkwardly.

"I still don't know how to get back to our real time. Maybe I should try the Return Card first…Or maybe just release the seal and create the time tunnel… Or…" he seemed not to realize Tomoyo's presence as he mumbled something about 'other dimension', 'old Greek curse', 'Tibetian teleportation circle', and some other that the woman couldn't comprehend.

"Whatever it would be," Eriol said finally looking at Tomoyo. "Until I could find the way back, I need you not to tell anyone –not even this time's version of your mother or Sakura or Kaze – about all of these. We can not risk anyone from this time to know. The consequences would be too dangerous,"

"Never do anything that might change the future –our real time. By this, means only with the big and significant things. You can ignore the other rest of those simple craps. Is that…" He noticed Tomoyo's seemingly out-of-space behavior. "You're okay?"

"Huh? Oh, yes. I-I'm fine… I guess."

Tomoyo guessed that having the memories of the most powerful magician ever alive, Eriol had his advantage to be calmer. Too calm, actually, for such a situation where he himself was still unsure of. She saluted him for that. For she practically couldn't be that calm. Didn't he think of how bad it is? Experiencing some things that better be left forgotten. Didn't he have such kind of pain in the past that he would never choose to remember?

"It seems that we are dragged back to the time 4 years ago," His words gladly brought her out of the reverie. "Try to remember the life you had at this time, and act like you're supposed to. Don't bring any suspicion."

She weakly nodded. "Ne, Eriol?"

"Yes?"

"We will…we can return back, right?"

His sapphire eyes remained unreadable as he silenced.

-----------

"I want you to keep it sophisticated, but simple enough. The main color er… let me see… Ah! It shall be pale pink. _Pale_ pink, note you. Not rose pink, light pink, coral pink or any other pinks," Sonomi said seriously. "It's a nice color don't you think, Tomoyo?"

Stammered off her thought, she slowly replied, "Yes, it is," without really thinking what was the topic about. Besides, she was too focused… or tried not to focus on the fact that she was with her mother again.

Meeting the living version of Sonomi Daidouji was something Tomoyo would never expect even when she was the wife of the reincarnation of the great sorcerer. True, all that caused her to be there at the moment must be some kind of magic, but she had just never guessed it.

And that made her not to prepare herself in front of her mother. It was like the mix of confusion, fear, anxiety, sadness and gladness in one. She wanted herself to be happy… now that she got the chance to see her mother again, but seeing her at the same time just brought the grief all over.

Tomoyo then felt her mother offered her something. "White Carnation. Nice flower. It means purity. What suits my daughter better than that?" Sonomi said as smiling.

The older Daidouji said so casually, but it made Tomoyo felt so… she didn't quite know how to put it. It was kinda weird, but comforting at the same time. Especially when it was said by her mother, the kind who usually got into the sentimental stuffs, and it just made the words mean a lot to Tomoyo.

She looked back at her mother. Sonomi, who seemed to notice this, turned back at her daughter and gave her caring smile.

It was like a warm breeze.

And all the sudden, all her worries just didn't really matter anymore. Her mother was with her at the moment.

For now, it was more than enough.

-------------

"You… look… well… not you," Honey-colored eyes glinted in amazement as she stared down at him.

Eriol groaned. "You wouldn't guess. What have just happened to me was damn sickening. I hate it, why it has to be in time like this, I –"

Kaho pushed him to the cushion and turned around behind him and gave him a massage. "No, no... You don't need to think about it now. Just relax,"

He tried to take a deep breath to calm himself down. Kaho's scent of rich rose seemed to be rather successful to ease his minds. Plus her massage wasn't bad too. As she massaged his temple, Eriol stared at the piles of books and scrolls (mostly were yellowing cause of their age) scattered in front of him. Just how much time had he spent to read all of those worthless theoretical pranks? Not any parchment or pages that gave him clue of the unlikely event of time-slip.

The sudden cold fingers that sneaked inside his shirt made him looked up at her. Kaho smirked and gave him a quick peck on the lips. "Just tell me what I can do for you," said she.

Be it in this time of the real time where he was supposed to be, Eriol, again, felt the slight guilt as for why he had still done such sinful act. But he dropped the feeling and his tired mind off, as he began to kiss his secret lover back.

-------

It was just later that day, when Tomoyo finally paid notice to the conversation her mother had been having with the petite woman that had been in front of her for a good 3 hours.

And she must say, the talk wasn't about her favorite subject.

"I'm gonna sum all our discussions now. If I may, Mrs. Daidouji?" said the copper-haired woman as she read her writings on her notes. "Er… the place will be in your private beach in Maui. It will be a garden party. But in case if it rains or any other bad things happened on the big day, you want me to fully-prepare the mansion too. You want the party to be dominated with pale pink as the color, and white carnation as the main decorative flowers. The cuisine will have the variety of Italian and Japanese foods. And the wedding's theme will be Victorian. Am I missing something?"

****Tomoyo's head jerked up at the certain word spoken previously.

"No. So, we will meet again this Saturday to discuss about the card design and more about the caterings?" asked Sonomi.

"Just as you wish, Mrs. Daidouji,"

"Of course. Why else am I hiring the best wedding-planner if not for my daughter's wedding's perfection?"

Whose wedding?

That was when she saw it: the beautiful diamond ring on her ring finger.

Oh right. She was still engaged to Eriol at this time.

The going-on-divorce couple was going to have their wedding repeated.

Hn.

Just how ironic.

TBC

Mind to review?


	3. The Good Daidouji Girl

Disclaimer : Me no own CCS

A/n: Sorry for the long chapter, but must say that this ones has more twists and dynamic then the previous 2 chapters.

Bolds+italics thoughts…

**Once and Again**

.Chapter 3. The Good Daidouji Girl

She had thought that wearing a wedding gown was every girl's best dream. Yes, Tomoyo knew she still had that part of little girl inside of her, but even a wedding gown fanatic would have slightly been a little (if not much) sick if she was ever pushed to try countless wedding dresses for 7 hours a day – 4 days continuously, like what the Daidouji heiress was forced to do.

It was still amazing actually, of how Sonomi could have stocks (what she meant with stocks was actually really an understatement) of that lot wedding dresses. Tomoyo understood enough her mother restless attempts to find the flawless dress –it was kinda similar to Tomoyo's childhood obsession to create outfits for Sakura. So she thought it must have run in the blood.

"I guess this one's better without the veil. Take it off, yes… Oh, no. It's worse. Put the veil back on…. No, it's awful. Damn, then I guess it's not this dress. Try this one, Tomoyo. Quick, quick!"

Tomoyo sighed as she took the other dress and got into the fitting room once more. This really started to get to her nerves. Sure, Tomoyo had passion for fashion –she always had –, but when one was trapped in a wrong place and time (yes, definitely wrong time), she could care less about those now-rather-silly-looking white gowns.

Her mother's head suddenly peeked from the fitting room's curtain, making the younger woman gasped surprisedly. "Kaa-san!"

"Sorry, no mean to disturb you, but I just think that dress really goes well with this wedding hat. You just _so have_ to try it too,"

----------

Eriol sighed for the umpteenth time since the first time he stood and waited at the apartment's door. Even to begin, waiting was never thing he enjoyed –unless if he had his several favorite things to accompany him. Like books or piano.

**_Or cigar_**, he thought as his hand just felt the strong urge to grab the nicotine's stick from its package in his pocket. Unfortunately for him, the area he was currently on was where smoking was prohibited.

Not that he would smoke here even if the veto wasn't there. Shewould kill her if she saw him smoking or drinking alcohol. Kaho always said that she hated man who smoked or drank alcohol.

Speaking of which, he wondered why the said woman wasn't at her home at this hour. Yes, it was only like 5 pm, but this was Saturday. Kaho hated to go anywhere on Saturday's afternoon.

**_Damn, where is she?_**

Eriol took a glance at his roses. Not as fresh as from when he had bought them earlier that day. Flicking his fingers in such a simple way, the roses then began to re-bloom once more.

**_Perfect flowers_**, he thought. **_Just waiting for this perfect woman who –_**

****He immediately straightened up his posture when he heard the elevator's door ding-ed and rolled open.

His guess was right. It was Kaho.

Only that… she wasn't all by herself.

Her red hair was a mess, her clothes were messier, and one of her perfect creamy leg being held up at the man's waist. Even at that slightest second, Eriol would know immediately who the man was and what a fool thing for him –especially being the Clow's reincarnation – not to have suspicion on the red-haired woman.

"Eriol?" Kaho broke her kiss when she saw him walking unaffectedly (or what seemed like an attempt to) towards the elevator.

"Hiiragizawa," spoke Terada, in a tone that was much more casual than what he was supposed to sound.

"If you two are done, I want to make a better use of the elevator, _please_?" Eriol asked with the piercing coldness, that the other two just stepped off the elevator quickly. He got in, had a suddenly disgusted look at the roses he had in hands and threw it harshly to Kaho before the elevator's door rolled closed.

----------

To whoever had called her mother in the middle of this gown-fitting session, Tomoyo was truly grateful for him/her. After receiving the emergency call, the still energetic CEO disappointedly discarded Tomoyo from the gown torture, and she dashed with her limousine to her second home: office.

She was in no mood to be back home, so she decided to just spend her time in this contemporary-styled café not far from the bridal shop. Her latte tasted good on her tongue and the nice atmosphere of the café helped her easing her mind more.

The jazz band performing on the stage started to fill the café with their melodious tunes. She had to smile. Jazz was never her favorite. But there was this certain bond she felt towards this kind of music. Perhaps because it reminded her so much of Kaze. Befriended with a great fan of jazz music and the jazz musician himself, he must have his way to sneak jazz's fondness inside her mind.

And was it coincidence? She just thought she saw the very dark hair that she knew very well.

**_Don't tell me…_**

The brown-haired guy then approached her. It was then she knew that she wasn't imagining things.

"Kaze!" Tomoyo exclaimed when seeing her best friend, few years younger, with hair in messier style.

He smirked. "Why, hello dear friend."

--------------

"Another…" Eriol said as he raised the small glass waiting for the bartender fill it with more liqueurs.

"Sir, I think it's enough. This is your –"

"When I said 'another' , then it shall means that you save your little speech for yourself and do what you're being paid for," he said slowly. But the effect of those dark, evil-looking eyes was more than enough to shut the poor bartender up. He filled the glass again, Eriol drank it at once, and asked for more.  
**_That bch, he growled. Such a hypocrite. Telling me she hated men who smoke and drank alcohol, while she herself secretly dating the man who did_**, Eriol growled as he remembered the strong cigar-smell from Terada and the beer bottle he was holding while kissing her.

**_And to think, she actually did no action to explain the situation or whatsoever. If she really cared, then she would at least try to clarify things, right?_**

"Slut," he murmured darkly as taking another gulp of his drink.

The pain feeling nagging at the bottom of his heart was plainly unbearable. Yes, he could get it away in every gulp of alcohol, but the effect was temporary. And so the pain felt tripled, when he decided to pause himself from drinking, and –want it or not – make the thoughts came back to his mind again.

It was like being a damn fool who fell into the same hole for the hundredth times –and perhaps he was more a fool than that. In this state of mind, Eriol let the honesty seeped out.

True, it wasn't his first time he saw his secret lover cheated over him. But the fact that now he was dragged back to several years back –and found out that Kaho had cheated on him even ever since before he was married with Tomoyo – made it even worse. Usually he forgave her, because she always reasoned it was hard being his secret lover, saying that she wouldn't ever cheat on him if he had agreed to leave on Tomoyo –which Eriol could have never done previously to the feeling of obligations.

But this time, he didn't know why, he just… couldn't take it anymore.

And for once, he could never see Kaho as the kind of woman he would ever love or respect anymore. In some way, he was relieved he had decided to finally leave that damn woman.

But above all, he still felt mad and betrayed.

And for all of those years he had refused to see the truth, Eriol would reward himself the alcohol effect. And shall the poor bartender suffered along with him, as he ordered more and more of those addictive liquor.

--------

"Oh my, he has children now! That Kanzaki-sensei!"

Kaze nodded. "Unbelievable, isn't it? Remember when we got that bet on what age he would ever get married? You bet it would be in his late forties, when I bet that he would never get married at all? Well, he actually got married before he reached the age of 35,"

Tomoyo smiled. "I feel bad. We were rather cruel back then. Maybe some time we should visit him?"

"Sure," the jade-eyed guy said before taking another sip of his soda.

"…You're never one who can stand liquor, eh?"

He grinned. "You know me well,"

Tomoyo exhaled a content breath. Being with Kaze always had that kind of effect for her. Be it with this time's Kaze or the one from 4 years further. "This is… calming you know. It feels like I've never talked to you for such a long time,"

"Well, practically, we haven't really talked that much since you're engaged to that Hiiragizawa,"

"Really?"

"Yeah. Don't you know? Your mother forbids me to go near you," he said casually. "Oh, that reminds me. I guess you'd better be home now. Who knows what your mother will do to me if she ever found out that her daughter is still out at this hour with any man except for her ever-perfect future son in law?"

Tomoyo glanced at her wrist watch. Almost 11 pm. Yes, Sonomi would explode if she weren't home before 12. Tomoyo still got her time, but then again, she wasn't in the mood to spend the rest one hour in this place. After their meeting in the café, Kaze took her to this nightclub. The later the night, the club was just getting more crowded –and unfortunately the crowds were just mostly some stupid drunken men. Good enough that Kaze was there to accompany her. Even better now, that they had decided to leave the place.

The sound of chattering glass was heard just when they passed the bar section. Tomoyo would have ignored it, if it hadn't been for that achingly-familiar figure.

"Hoow maanyy timmess do I neewd tow thell you! Fiil my glaasw agaain!"

Those blue eyes. Yes, it was him.

"Basshtarrd! Do a-as I –"

"Eriol?"

The dark-haired guy snapped his head up suddenly at hearing his name being called, and turned around to see whose voice was it. His brooding, sapphire eyes lit up when seeing the raven-haired young woman. "Ah," he spoke in natural-acknowledgement. "Tomoyo. What a goowd girrl like you doiiing in such plaaace?"

"Whatever she is doing, Hiiragizawa, is definitely not like anything you might and have done here," Kaze spoke –not bothering to hide his disgust towards the drunken man.

Eriol spoke as if Kaze had never said anything. "So youw arre with this guy. No woonderr, Tomoyo."

"What does that suppose to mean, Hiiragizawa?"

"Oh, nothing," he replied innocently.

Sensing her best friend had almost let his temper got over him, Tomoyo then took part in the dialogue. "Eriol's drunk, Kaze. He doesn't know what he's talking about,"

The sorcerer then grabbed her wrist, all the sudden. His voice was stern. "Are you trying to cheat over me too, Tomoyo-chan? Oh, no. You won't, right? Such a good, nice, loyal girl like you would never do such thing. Ne, I'm right, am I not, Tomoyo?" he asked playfully as stroking her cheeks.

"Eriol, you're drunk. You'd better go home and –"

"Ooooh… I'm all okay!" he exclaimed in drunken euphoria. "You don't have to worry aaabouuut mee! I have called Ruby and Spinel to pick me up…"

"But–"

"Let's go, Tomoyo," Kaze said as pulling her away. Before she could protest, the jade-eyed man spoke again. "He can take care of himself."

_And_ before she could protest _more_, Kaze had grasped her wrist and dragged her out.

-------

"I _really_ want to see your mother's expression if she ever caught her _perfect son_ that way," Kaze grunted as he tried to swing the swing he was standing on.

"Yes. That will be priceless," Tomoyo said as swinging faster.

The two were taking their time by playing on some random park –much to Tomoyo's request. Just a few moments after they went out of the bar, Sonomi succeed in making contacts to her daughter by phone, told her to go home immediately and said that a driver had been sent to pick Tomoyo up. Not wanting her mother to know where she had been spending her time, the violet-eyed lady told the driver to just pick her up on the nearby park.

Kaze had smirked at this. Saying that she really was too old for that kind of pick-up thing. Then Tomoyo mentioned something about 'The Daidouji Sonomi's order' and he seemed to understand… for that moment.

Because when they were playing the swings on the park in that starless night, Kaze then began one of his speeches again.

"You know what, Tomoyo?" he said when finally deciding to stop the swing. "Even if it was your ever great mother or Japan Prime Minister himself, nobody had control in your life besides yourself,"

She quirked an eyebrow. She realized what he meant, but then again, how he related the example somehow with the Japan Prime Minister was still amusing in her eyes.

"Your problem is classic," he continued. "You just hate to disappoint people. You'd better hurt yourself than to let someone down. Don't get me wrong, that is sincerely very, very nice of you. It's just that… Tomoyo, if you keep on doing that without even considering how you really think and feel, someday you will be caught in a dead-end. Seriously. World isn't all for saint, and you just should be more careful with that kind of behavior," and then, out of sudden, Kaze shook his head. "God, now you're probably accusing me on being the next Touya."

Somehow, beside the gratefulness of his concern, she found something rather comical there. She just couldn't see why Kaze didn't go well enough with her mother and Touya Kinamoto, when the three of them shared the same over protectiveness.

"Oh just look. The princess' ride has come," Kaze commented as the flash lights from the approaching white Porsche could be seen. "Time for the brat to go," he sighed as putting on his helm and get on his Harley. "You will be okay?"

The Porsche had stopped in front of her. She spoke, "Yes. Thanks for the great evening, Kaze."

He nodded as starting his bike and rode away.

The car's window rolled down. "Your mother won't be too pleased if she knows you go out with that child again. Poor boy. He seems nice," said Takuma –the senior driver among all other Daidouji's personal drivers.

"He really is. Mother just underestimates him too much," said Tomoyo as her hand reached the door's handle to open it.

It was just the second later, an arm came from her behind and closed the door back.

"I'll take her home, Takuma-san. You can go back and have your rest,"

Tomoyo didn't need to turn around to know whose voice was it. The oh-so-familiar voice of Hiiragizawa Eriol.

**_How could he be here…all so sudden?_** She mentally noted. Not even an hour when she last saw her drunken condition. And now, whoops-a-daisy he just showed up in a state that didn't even give anyone the chance to even think he had been drunk just recently.

At the end, she always concluded that it was his own way of magic –with him being the reincarnated of a powerful sorcerer and all.

Takuma glanced worriedly at Tomoyo. "B-but Daidouji-sama has requested –"

"I've called her and she said it was okay. And besides… I need to have some times alone with my…" his arm suddenly wrapped around Tomoyo's body and he smiled down at her. "Fiancée,"

Takuma returned his gaze to his young mistress –asking for her approval. Tomoyo nodded slowly and told him to go. And after finally being convinced, the old driver drove the car away.

"Okay, what is it?" she snapped as turning around to face the blue-eyed guy.

"What is what?" he asked ingenuously as playing with her black wavy hair.

His sudden flirtatious act didn't go unnoticed. She snapped his hand off. "You got drunk. What happens? You've never drank before and –"

"Just what makes you sure I've never been drunk before, Tomoyo? 4 years we're married, but you know just very little side of me," he spoke as bridged their distance. "And it really isn't that late for us to discover each other's little secret. Right, Tomoyo?" his lips were just brushing against her ear. She shivered involuntary.

She could smell the scent of expensive liquor and his minty breath. So it seemed that the great magician himself wasn't over his drunkenness. Pushing his limp body away, Tomoyo then spoke, "Do you bring your car? I'll drive you home and –"  
Before Tomoyo could realize it, Eriol suddenly _jumped_ and _attacked_ her.

She didn't get the time to react, as he slammed her body to a tree, pinned both her hands up, and kissed her lips fiercely.

Widened her eyes, Tomoyo tried to struggle free. The initiative to use her legs to kick some certain area was soon put in vain, as when Eriol touched her knees; she suddenly couldn't feel her legs anymore.

In both surprise and panic, she yelled at him, "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING! LET ME GO!"

Tomoyo didn't know why, but when his finger touched her chin and pulled it up so her eyes were trapped in his brilliant blue, she couldn't find her way to shout again. And damn him, yes, that damn Hiiragizawa, for making her mind twirled in contradicting ecstasy, making her heart jolted uncontrollable, and worse, making her body reacted towards his kisses and touches…

**_Damn, damn that psychotic jerk… _**

"I'm your legal husband, and you don't even let me do the things that I have my rights on," He said simply, before burying his face on her shoulders, showering them with his butterfly kisses.

Cursing herself for ever let out a stifled moan, Tomoyo then muttered almost helplessly. "Eriol… please, let go –"

Her pleas did nothing to make the situation better for her. The drunken man just went further and tried to open her blouse. In the middle of his doing he then stopped.

"Is that because of that guy, Tomoyo?"

His eyes were unreadable.

And for the first time, she realized that she really didn't know him well. He was right. 4 years of marriage, and very little thing she knew about Hiiragizawa Eriol.

She couldn't say a word to comment his question. Chill breeze passed her way, and then without warning, his kiss went lower, and Tomoyo gathered her guts and with all her might, she managed to get her hands free from his grasp, and punched him as hard as she could.

Eriol tripled over backward and fell to the ground. He didn't move.

**_Whoops, did I smack him that hard!_**

****Looking down at her crumpled and opened blouse, Tomoyo decided that she didn't want to care even if he lied there unconscious until the next morning. And she even had to hold this strong urge to kick his limp body once more. Husband or no husband, he had treated her the way she would never expect him to do. And a Daidouji, would never accept any kind of disrespect act. So, after she buttoned up her blouse, and gladly finding out she could use her legs again, Tomoyo took the long run as far as she could from the Hiiragizawa lunatic.

She would deal with him any later time.

**TBC**

A/n: Sorry for the later scenes… I just looooveeee to see the bad side of Eriol. (and write about it too, as it seemed… hohoho)


	4. When She Smiles

Disclaimer: I don't own CCS.

**Thee Anna**: Thanks for the comment. Yes, I'm so sorry if last chapter's content disturbed you. It's just that I needed to put that scene for the sake of the story, but maybe I was illustrating it too graphic/rude? My deepest apology. Also to other people who felt disturbed too, so so sorry…

On to the fic…. Do enjoy…

**Once and Again**

.Chapter 4. When She Smiles

When Hiiragizawa Eriol appeared in front of her door the next day, Tomoyo's hand instinctively pushed the door to close.

And she swore she would never open that door again unless that damn Hiiragizawa had disappeared from the Daidouji compound. Fortunately for the sapphire-eyed sorcerer, Sonomi Daidouji came down from her room, and opened the door happily when she saw that 'son-she-would-never-really-have' standing on the doorway.

That explained this odd situation where the two actually-husband-and-wife were sitting in the living room of the Daidouji's by themselves (Sonomi had thought of herself as the great lovemaker by making the decision to leave them alone, at least that was what seen from the giggling version of her).

"Five minutes. And then you have to go," Tomoyo spoke coldly.

"Look Tomoyo –"

"I don't say that you have the rights to talk to me,"

He ignored her. "I am sorry for what I did to you last night. Really… that was only the drunken side of me. A-and I really never meant to disrespect you, it was an accident,"

"An accident,"

"Yes. And accident. And I'm so sorry for that,"

"Okay. Apologies accepted. Now you can go,"

He sighed. "You haven't forgiven me,"

"Oh, I have. I only don't want to see your face yet, Hiiragizawa. Go away,"

"I still have 4 minutes,"

She glared at him. "4 minutes. Then you'll go,"

"… 3 minutes. Then I'll go," he said suddenly as standing up and going out of the living room, much to Tomoyo's confusion. But the confuse was soon replaced with fear as he heard him talk to her mother –her mother, of all people!.

"Daidouji-sama, may I take your daughter out on this beautiful day?"

Sonomi Daidouji was more then delighted to hear his future son-in-law's asking. She spiritedly shooed her daughter to go out with her _fiancée_. The big boss of Daidouji didn't let her daughter's reluctance got in the way on such a perfect way to get the couple hooked up together.

"See? 3 minutes, and I'm out of your house," he grinned mischievously.

Tomoyo closed the front door and glared at him. "Technically, you're not yet off my house, Eriol," she pointed at the fact that they were strolling on the long pathway towards the Daidouji Mansion's gates.

He chuckled at that.

---------

"We've broken up,"

Tomoyo was just about to open her vegetarian burger's wrapping when he said that –casually.

"Who broke up?"

"Kaho and I,"

"Oh. Well…" She didn't exactly know what to say. Her actual husband had just confessed that he had broken up with his secret lover, what was she supposed to say?

Eriol seemed to know this, as he continued his sayings. "I don't know why, but I just have the urge to tell you,"

The whole situation felt awkward for her (and perhaps for him –but if so, the sorcerer was truly very good at hiding it). Sitting next to each other in that bench on the park after they went to order something from veggie restaurant (Much to Tomoyo's relief –for Eriol to realize that she had been a semi-vegetarian since the second year of their marriage), talking stuffs –the most awkward stuffs – and just plainly acted… odd.

They ate in silence, until then Tomoyo broke it. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you two break up?"

"Sudden realization," he said after moment of thoughts. "Some things just aren't exactly for each other."

"Oh."

"Do you realize? This is one of the rare time we can actually spend quality time together."

"Really?" she asked lazily.

He nodded.

Silence.

She was then gazing at the view around, when he suddenly spoke again.

"I'm sorry,"

Turning to him, Tomoyo then replied, "I've told you. I'm not really mad. You were drunk last night and –"

"Not only about last night,"

Her amethyst eyes gazed at his sapphires' ones.

Eriol sighed. "I've never really been a good husband,"

"Honestly, I can never expect much from you. You were pushed by my mother to do this marriage. It's not your fault, Eriol. You don't love me. I don't love you. What is to expect?"

"I love you,"

She got choked at this.

Realizing what his words could drive anyone who heard that into thinking of some certain direction, he quickly added. "No, Tomoyo. I mean… I love you as friend. Good friend. We've known each other since 5th grade, and you are the kindest person I've ever known. And that is exactly why you didn't deserve an inch of what I've done towards you in our marriage,"

"Don't blame yourself, Eriol. I too –"

"Whatever the reason we got hooked in matrimony, the day we were proclaimed as husband and wife, it was the day that I was supposed to do my responsibility to you. You don't love me, you even love that Araide guy, but you remained loyal and understanding –too understanding, if you ask me. I didn't deserve those. Your loyalty, your care, your companion, your understanding… for all those years, Tomoyo…"

Somehow and suddenly it felt rather hard for her to blink. She was afraid her burning eyes would shed tears if she blinked.

It was like all her disappointment and hurt for 4 years revealed to the surface for the first time.

"It's okay to cry,"

And even if she would make a scene (definitely a scene) in that park (total luck, there wasn't much people there) by sobbing and crying, she decided to break the rule and let her tears flowed.

She felt his hand patted her head as he calmed her down. "It's okay. You may cry. You need to get it out. You can even punch me if you're mad at me. It's okay, Tomoyo…. Let it all out. You're gonna be okay…"

---**a month later**---

"And I really was sure that I've found it. Damn, the structures are very similar. I thought this was the one that could get us back…"

Tomoyo could only smile when hearing the Hiiragizawa's guy (supposedly) private mutter. Flipping the last page of the current green book she was reading, and finding no information that could be useful, she quickly put it aside and took another thick book from the gigantic library in that Reed Mansion.

She was scanning through the 4th page, when he suddenly spoke, "I guess we should call it a break, Tomoyo. Thanks for your help today,"

"No need to be so formal, Eriol. I also have the responsibility to help this search. Coffee?"

"Let me," he said as he stood up and followed her to the kitchen.

So, a month had almost passed with them still trapped in this time play. For Eriol and Tomoyo, days passed rather casually. Since the event occurred in the park that day, the two had been strangely close to each other. It had felt rather odd at the first time. Again, remembering that quantity in time could never make it in quality. 4 years could mean nothing, and to Tomoyo personally, she felt much more relaxed and open to her supposedly husband these following days then in their marital life.

"Can it be blamed if I ever had the thought that not being able to go back to our real time is actually fine?" she murmured nonchalantly as she poured extra milk to the coffee.

Eriol shrugged. "Believe it or not, but I had just thought the same thing. Only Tomoyo… we can't stay here forever,"

She grinned. "Yes, I know. It's just that… it feels so peaceful here. In fact, I've never really felt this calm for a long time…" She handed the coffee cup to Eriol –which he accepted gratefully (Among all, Tomoyo was the one who knew how to make the flawless coffee for Eriol's taste). Sipping her own coffee, she then continued again, "Seems like we had so many problems in our real time,"

"Well, actually Tomoyo… problems are just there anywhere, anytime."

She laughed. It wasn't in any way funny, but one thing she also had found out was that she could laugh much more often nowadays. "Yes. Sure,"

The rest of the evening went by rather pleasantly. Accompanied by more cups of coffee (warm milk, later for Tomoyo –for she couldn't stand the caffeine overdose), the two sat comfortably on the cushions available at the Reed Manor's living room. Spinel and Ruby would barge in even now and then, making some chaotic scene then went away –just to create another scene some moments later. But overall, the evening until then was rather perfect.

"Tomoyo?"

"Hn?"

"Back then in our real time we actually belong…"

"Yes?"

"Well…I never really liked that new curtain on our bedroom."

She smirked. The prodigy could appear rather idiotic some time. "What is with that, all so sudden?"

"Just the sudden memory. I just need to be more honest to you,"

"Start with such thing?"

He grinned again. "Yes. Start with such things…"

Moments passed.

"So… we've never really been that honest towards each other before, aren't we?" Tomoyo asked rhetorically. "And to think, Naoko had once commented that we were such a perfect couple… How hypocrite of us,"

He didn't like the way this was heading. The good mood just suddenly got ruined. He realized that Tomoyo had never truly meant to bring up this subject, but it had appeared now, want it or not.

And he hated it. The talk about their marriage in such a depressing viewpoint…

"Good thing that we're ending it,"

Even if now he felt the sudden unease at his heart, Eriol pretended not to notice it and even masked it even more. "Yes. We're still going to divorce after we got back to our real time, aren't we?"

"Of course…"

He cursed mentally. Where all those good moods from previous moment floated off?

Looking at the now silent woman, Eriol decided to distract her from thinking anything depressing. He just hated to see her confused, sad, or feeling anything that could wipe those angelic smile off her face. So he cleared his thought and then spoke, "It's late, Tomoyo. Come on, I'll take you home."

The drive to the Daidouji Manor was going in lack of talks. It could actually be a complete silence if it wasn't for the jazzy tunes coming from the radio.

Contrasted the silence outside him, Eriol's inner side was having a great commotion. And somehow, he felt that all the chaos inside himself led only to one solution (or possible: more problems), and that was Tomoyo.

What was it with her?

No.

What was it with _him_?

"Thanks for the ride, Eriol."

He snapped off the reality and looked up to see that they had arrived at the Daidouji Mansion. Stopping the car, the raven haired lady gave a polite smile before stepping out of his car.

Damn it, it wasn't the kind of smile he wanted to see from her.

Getting off his car, he called upon her. "Ne, Tomoyo?"

She turned around and finding out that the bespectacled man had already in front of her. "Yes, Eriol?"

He exhaled a breath before continuing. "Problems… are just there. You can never run from it. You have your problem rough, yes, everybody has it also,"

She eyed him confusedly. What was he trying to say?

"Whatever that we will decide later about our relationship, Tomoyo… it will never change the fact that I'll always be your friend. I'll always be there to help you go through it all. I promise."

He suddenly smiled. There was hope in her eyes, her belief of him, and the souls in her deep amethyst regained back. Now if only he could see her smile again…

He messed up her ebony locks fondly–enjoying very much her facial expression. "I had said that I wanted to be more honest with you. Well then, this was one of it…"

Before she could blink out of bewilderment, he bent down to place an innocent kiss on her forehead.

"I always love to see your smile," he murmured. Not letting her give any reply, he continued with a 'good night', and a casual walk towards his car. He started the engine, and his black car drove away out of the Daidouji's residence.

Tomoyo –still standing dazedly on her doorway, and probably would stay in the same position for quite a time, if not for Sonomi's sudden coughs.

"I saw you both…" the chestnut-haired woman said in sing-song voice.

"What?" the daughter retorted.

"Kissing under the moonlight…"

Tomoyo chuckled. "It was platonic. He only kissed me on the forehead."

"Well…" Sonomi spoke again –still with the same mischievousness. "That makes me wonder more, how red would you be –if he really kissed you on the lips,"

**TBC**

A/n: Almost got into a writer's block, while working on this chapter…


	5. Covet

Disclaimer: I don't own CCS

**-strictly ext only- **: I never like Eriol/Kaho pairing. Even before I fell in love with Eriol/Tomoyo pairing, I have already sensed something odd with the first mentioned couples. Like hell, that pedophile old hag. Yes, I abhor Eriol/Kaho pairing. Only that sometimes, for the sake of the story, I have to write a little about them.

**Once and Again**

_.Chapter 5. Covet_

It was another early evening in Tomoeda, and Eriol, was stuck in his own enormous library –like his routine these days –, trying to find the… yes, the ever same way to get back to the normal life.

Tomoyo hadn't been able to help that day –for her mother had had her into coming to see the wedding planner. Understanding enough how Sonomi had persistent and persuading effects on peoples, Eriol agreed to be jammed in his own library alone for this time.

It was after the few more hours alone, that the piss started to seep into his mind. It was never normal for him for not being able to solve a problem. To make it worse, it had been quite some time since he first tried to work this out. Even with the cover of such a calm magician, the feeling of incapability could actually whirl inside his mind and made chaos –the ratherly unseen one.

Eriol was letting out the umpteenth tired sigh and he was about to give up compressing his brain with these difficult books, when he suddenly heard small explosions on his right side, followed instantly by familiar auras.

And before he could give any reaction, there was the sudden growl coming from the creature that was now standing in his might at Eriol's library.

"Master, you're gonna have to listen carefully to what we're going to say. Sakura could only manage us less then 5 minutes for us to be in this time,"

Eriol –eyes widened in shock – murmured, "Cerberus…? Yue…?"

"This is about the clause of why you and Tomoyo-sama could be dragged back to the past, and the way for you two to come back," was spoken calmly by the Moon Guardian.

------------------

"Your wedding is less than 2 weeks away, Tomoyo! I have everything about it under control, except for your choice of wedding gown! Can't you at least be helpful?" commented Sonomi before she got back to her phone call. "Not pink! How many times should I tell you! White! I want white carnations for my daughter's wedding!"

Tomoyo had her gaze back at the pages of her photographs while wearing all those wedding gowns she had tried on. Yes, Sonomi Daidouji had actually made all the fittings documented. And there were tons of those photographs.

It wasn't that Tomoyo hadn't chosen which gown she liked. She had. Oh yes, ever since she tried on that simple, classic-cut gown, she had already felt the kind of 'this is it' towards that gown. The matter was actually finding the gown that matched Sonomi's taste… and standard.

Sometimes Tomoyo just couldn't see the point on how she was making it difficult for her own self. She had been through that damn wedding, anyway. She knew exactly which gown she would wear–or actually, had worn: the elegant gown with lots of small diamonds on it –her mother's choice, of course.

Damn, if her mother hadn't pushed her to take the care of these wedding fluff, she could just help Eriol in his library. She felt rather guilty for leaving him working alone.

Sonomi was still busy talking with her cell phone, when Tomoyo felt her own cell phone buzzed.

Seeing the caller id, she then picked up the call. Before she could say any greetings, the voice from the other line had spoken.

"We have to meet. Now,"

------------------

It was late afternoon, the sun had almost sunk down, and Sonomi was just about to get inside her manor after her routine late afternoon walk, when she heard the approaching footsteps behind. Turning around, she then faced the panting Hiiragizawa guy.

"Daidouji-sama, is Tomoyo inside?" he asked with such urgency.

Sonomi blinked when hearing Eriol's word. "Isn't she with you?"

Trying hard to control his raging breath, he then replied, "Huh? No. She isn't,"

"My, my. She rushed out after receiving a phone call. I thought it was from you… It wasn't, eh?"

Tiredly, Eriol shook his head. **_Damn, where is she at such time? _**

"We can wait for her to come back inside the house. With tea, perhaps?" offered Sonomi.

"Thank you for your kind offer, Daidouji-sama. But I got to go and search for Tomoyo. Please excuse me," he said quickly before hurried out of the Daidouji compound.

"God, seriously… you made me escape from my mother just for this?" Tomoyo exclaimed in the mix of annoyance and amusement. "Just to get your so-called evening walk?"

"Hey, we haven't been able to meet for quite some time! Is it wrong for me if I miss my dear friend?" Kaze grinned.

The park where they were strolling down at, was pretty crowd less at the time being. Such a tranquil night it was. More to the two friends' gladness. The chat went idly and rather idiotically, when the lad or sometimes the lass chose to give such a stupid comment.

It wasn't until the next 30 minutes that Kaze stopped and tried to say what he really wanted to say at the first place.

"Tomoyo?"

"Yes?"

"In two weeks, you're getting married, right?"

"Yes…"

"In two weeks, you're already somebody else's,"

Knowing where this conversation was leading, Tomoyo then spoke up. "Kaze, even if I am married to Eriol, it won't ever change the friendship we had."

The Araide guy suddenly gave such a sinister chuckle. "That's rather cliché, Tomoyo. You know that nothing will be the same from that day on."

Tomoyo was silenced. Of course. Experiencing the years after her marriage with Eriol, she had known that, yes, some things would just have to change. Never be the same again.

"At least, I'm trying to keep our friendship, Kaze. We've been friends for these couple of years, and all those time I had with you were important and priceless. You are a good –"

"Stop it,"

"Huh? What?"

Seeing her clueless, he blurted out. "Damn it, Tomoyo! I don't want to only be your friend!" His intent jade eyes bore into her violet ones. "You know I love you,"

Strike.

This was one of the times where Tomoyo detest herself the most. This was time when she suddenly felt foreign with her own feeling, the moment when she felt that all this tugging feeling was more bitter and harsh then she would ever prefer it to be.

In short, she hated it.

She hated it when his green eyes looked deep into her soul –probably Kaze himself didn't realize– that those eyes had managed to make the guilt bubble up in her heart. Guilt, and other feelings, that had made her feel so fragile and wanted to cry.

She always hated to hurt him.

"Kaze…" she spoke –with the voice so weak, that she would actually never want anyone to hear from a Daidouji Tomoyo.

Kaze didn't speak any further. He just bent down, gently cupping her chin and planted a soft kiss on her lips.

…

To her surprise, she couldn't find the heart to return it back.

Wasn't this all she had been dreaming of? For she could finally experience the all love and romance gesture from the guy she cared for? Wasn't this it? The moment where she could really show and be honest about her feeling?

…

But what feeling just exactly?

For, on the contrary, what Tomoyo felt when Kaze's lips touched hers, was only even more confusion. More guilt and pain. It was just as if kissing him was a sin. As if kissing him would hurt everyone at the end.

Sensing the awkwardness, Kaze ended the kiss. "Tomoyo?"

"…I –"

She couldn't find herself to continue the supposed words, because suddenly there was a loud thud, and then Kaze fell down to the ground.

"Kaze! What the –" she exclaimed in shock, and before she could know it, she felt a hand gripped her wrist and yanked her to turn around.

"What are you doing with this bastard?" The cold voice started dangerously.

"Eriol!" she exclaimed in surprise. "Wha- What are _you_ doing! Were you the one who… oh my… are you alright, Kaze?" Tomoyo snatched her wrist off his grasp and kneeled down to her unconscious friend. She let out a relief sigh, finding out he was okay –despite the faint. But then again, she still had a business to finish. Standing up in mild rage, she then confronted her fiancée. "Do care to explain why you hit him, Hiiragizawa! What was wrong with you!"

The sapphire eyed guy didn't say anything, as his harsh breath steadied.

Realizing that he would keep his mouth silenced for this time, Tomoyo then spoke again. "Do you bring your car?"

He nodded.

"Then help me to get Kaze to your car,"

"What!" he finally spoke. In a disapproving spat, that was.

"What is with that 'what'! You hit him and thus, you have to be responsible! We got to take him to his house… or even the hospital if needed."

"Tch," Eriol disdainfully murmured something that Tomoyo couldn't really hear. But he agreed to help her get Kaze to his car –which, thankfully, was parked nearby. After laying Kaze's unaware body on the backseat, the two got into the car, and Eriol drove out of the broad pathway of the park.

The 15-minutes ride was spent in silence. Tomoyo had only dared to speak again when Eriol's black car stopped in front of Kaze's flats. He turned off the car's engine, and rolled down the window and then calmly smoked.

"Why did you do that to Kaze?"

He took a pretty long thought before answering. "Do what?"

Apparently, Eriol hadn't really been thinking at that silent moment.

"What is it with you, Eriol?" Tomoyo asked in the still attempt of being patience.

True, what Tomoyo had learnt nowadays, was that she seemed to see the more about Eriol during their 'visit' to this time. Both the good and bad (read: unexpected) side of him. Seemingly, almost everything he did (be it the nice or not-so-nice ones) always made her even more perplexed.

When he didn't reply again, Tomoyo tried with more cues. "You hit him. Why?"

Another long silence before he answered. Gladly, this time he made it more than just question-repeating. "It was his fault."

Though that, his answer seemed to be inadequate for her. "Kaze's fault? What was that, exactly?"

He shrugged.

This guy was really trying her patience. Tomoyo then continued, "For what I remember, you were the one who punched him, without any logical reason, without any warning, without him doing any provoking things and –"

He snorted. "Not provoking? He kissed you, Tomoyo!"

His sudden outburst startled her a bit. She was silenced, for a moment. "Yes, he did. So?"

Eriol turned around to face her. Faces only inches apart. Tomoyo could feel blood rushed faster in her veins. She could never made her heart be steady when a man gazed at her with such a close distant. The fact that it was Eriol Hiiragizawa who did it, was even made her cheeks felt warm quicker.

As for why, she couldn't really decipher.

"You are my wife –"

"Funny how just now you're really considering me as your wife," she cut him.

" –And honestly Tomoyo," he continued unaffectedly. "I've never thought that you would be someone that low to ever do such thing."

That did it. He had gone too far.

"Low? _Low_! Now, look who's talking! Kaze only kissed me for one time, mind you! And, Eriol, one thing you must know, never in our marriage time have I done any kind of affair with Kaze! Even when I love him! You know that!"

…

"Do you really?" He asked.

She refused to answer, and in another masked attempt to avoid the subject, Tomoyo just continued her defend. "I could have actually done things like what you and Kaho did, but I didn't. You know why? Because I respected you!"

He snorted. Backing off on this retort challenge (as it seemed for him) wasn't an option for him. "So it proves more that what you have done earlier was the act of disrespect towards me,"

At this, she nearly screamed. "IT WAS ONLY A KISS!"

"A kiss that could have driven you two into doing a shameful act, if I hadn't stopped it,"

"S-Shameful act! Now what do you call your sex with Kaho is! A good thing only saint could do!"

"…What I did with Kaho was none of your business,"

Trying not literally to show her growing temper, she let out the anger with the poise only a Daidouji could manage.

"Then what I did with Kaze was none of your business too,"

Silence.

"Whatever, woman," Eriol murmured.

Without saying another word, Tomoyo gracefully stepped off his car, called for the young men whom she recognized as being Kaze's neighbors, and asked them to help her taking Kaze back to his flat.

After getting Kaze out of Eriol's car, Tomoyo then took her clutch bag and spoke calmly towards the sorcerer. "I think it will be better if we don't meet each other for this time being,"

"…Fine. Just go and help your little lover boy there,"

Not commenting anything, the amethyst-eyed woman just closed his car's door and walked into Kaze's apartments flat. Later, she could hear the driving away sound from Eriol's car. She concluded that he must have gone now.

_**That bastard.**_

After making sure that Kaze was tucked safely in his bed and that he would be all right, Tomoyo sighed tiredly and walked out of his room and apartment's building. The street was rather empty now, and she was glad to find that there was still Taxi operating at such time and place.

Without Tomoyo's knowing, Eriol was still watching inside his hiddenly-parked car. He drove his car in the safe distance behind the taxi.

Only to make sure.

He lit his cigar again. Not a thing he used to do (smoking, that was). Only when he felt jittery, anxiety, great grief and any other mixed emotions that he did smoke.

Damn it.

Kaho had never made him this paranoid. Being with Kaho seemed a lot simpler. A night of sex, a night of fun, without the fear that he may ended up hurting his companion or what.

With Kaho, Eriol had never felt it was necessary to protect her from being with another guy.

With Kaho, he had never felt his heart beat this fast…

With Kaho, he had never wanted to make her feel so much happiness.

…

On that silent night, Hiiragizawa Eriol realized that falling in love could actually torture a human's soul in so many different ways.

**TBC**

A/n: Need feedbacks to improve this story, you know. … Soo…. Review! xD


	6. Here it Comes

**Disclaimer: I don't own CCS**

**Once and Again**

.Chapter 6. Here it Comes

"I truly have never seen a bride as beautiful as you are, dear daughter."

Tomoyo looked up to see her mother's soft eyes. On that day –which, among all, she thought was the weirdest one ever to be repeated –, she was all ready and prepared. The wedding was held none in the big and beautiful garden of the Daidouji's. Somehow, Tomoyo had made her mother see all the advantages of not having the wedding at Honolulu –as Sonomi's earlier wish. The beautiful bride could still see her mother stole casual glances at the view above and outside the window –at the big and beautiful garden that was now decorated beautifully in simple and softer Victorian theme (The best thing Tomoyo could compromise with her mother –who, at first, demanded it to be fully decorated in Victorian style).

"I must admit the gown looks as if it was designed exclusively for you," Sonomi commented again, as seeing her daughter's reflection on the mirror with the simple, spaghetti-strap gown. "But let me choose your veil, please… Tomoyo?"

Just like the Sonomi Daidouji's antics. The daughter could only smile. She didn't mind. Sonomi chose such a pretty, simply-laced veil anyway. The silky fabric contrasted her raven hair beautifully.

"… I haven't been a good daughter, have I?" Tomoyo suddenly murmured.

Unaffected, Sonomi kept on arranging the veil on Tomoyo's head. "Well… we can never have the perfect daughter anyway." And there was suddenly the bright smile on the older woman's face. "But when I have you, I could not ask for anything more."

Tomoyo stared at her mother's soft eyes through the mirror's reflection.

"You completed my life, Tomoyo."

Her eyes widened. "Kaa-san…"

There were suddenly soft glaze on her amethyst eyes. To finally realized that this might be the last time she could ever see and talk and touch her mother as a living person.

"Crybaby. But it's alright, I guess. Be glad that your make-up is waterproof,"

The raven haired lady chuckled at that, and her tears dropped when she did. She still felt it odd –crying and laughing at the same time. But if the oddness was something she had to experience in order to feel this… happy, then just be it.

"I love you, Kaa-san."

"Say that to your soon-to-be husband, silly," Sonomi spoke as embarrassedly wiped off the tears. "Damn. I promised not to be too sentimental on your wedding day. But you made me ruin my promise, Tomoyo."

She grinned.

"Your father isn't here, but for us, being parents… this may be the time when we're finally letting our little Tomoyo go. To fly and choose your own path. To find your own happiness. The question is, are you ready for that? Do you really want it?"

Tomoyo couldn't reply. Of course she wanted happiness. Who wouldn't? But…

Sonomi finished the thought for her. "Happiness does cost much. But it's worth it, Tomoyo." Sonomi then kissed her daughter's cheek. "I gotta go now. See you down at the garden."

And with that, Sonomi closed the dressing room door –leaving Tomoyo for her time alone.

Seemed that the alone time given wasn't that much. For just a few minutes later, the big door was opened again, and this time, revealing _him_.

Dark brown hair, jade eyes…

"Kaze!" She exclaimed in surprise. "What are you –"

"Tomoyo?" The Araide guy asked in a way that made her thought that he wasn't even sure how he could ever be in such place. "You're here," Or not.

"Yes… w-why? What is it?"

His emerald eyes were kept masked, unreadable –and she noticed that this was one of the rare times where she couldn't really read what was on his mind. Then, he walked fast towards her direction and grabbed her wrist.

"It's not too late,"

Confusedly, Tomoyo asked, "Not too late for what?"

The man who stood before her eyes suddenly seemed foreign to her. "I can get you out of this marriage. Together we can just run away. Escape from all of this mess, and start a happy life of our own."

"Wha –"

"Marry me, Tomoyo."

Her eyes widened at this. And that was when she remembered, that though she had been dragged back to her past, the history itself could actually change in some little ways (this one was definitely wasn't anything little). Her mother had never been so honest before, Kaze had also never been so bold, She herself had never been so…

Confused…

"I don't understand what you're trying to imply, Kaze," she replied, though what was on her mind was just the exact opposite of it.

"Hiiragizawa won't make you happy, Tomoyo. This marriage will only bind your freedom. Screw that four-eyed bastard," Kaze grunted –seemingly hadn't yet forgotten what the sapphire-eyed guy had done to him some 2 weeks ago. "Marry me, and I'll take you out of all this clutter, we can run away together and –"

"Like hell will I let it happens,"

The voice was cold and calm, and yet there were also the urgency and the undeniable ultimatum in his tone.

"Hiiragizawa," Kaze said with the sickest tone he managed to let out.

The Clow reincarnation ignored the other guy as he held Tomoyo's hand tightly, almost jerking her from (He actually cringed at this) Kaze's hand hold. "Don't touch her. She's mine,"

"What? All the times you've never really cared for her, and just now you show up? How pathetic." Kaze commented.

"Not as pathetic as someone who's trying to steal another man's fiancée. Just who's more desperate?"

Both men exchanged glares.

"Hey you two –"

Tomoyo's attempt to bring peace was cut by Kaze's sudden saying. "Out of this room. We have some things to discuss." He turned around and heading out of the room, knowing the other guy would follow him. They were finally out of the room. After making sure the door was closed and the raven haired woman couldn't hear them, Kaze then spoke again. "Why now?"

"What?"

"Why you showed up now? Why not before? Why now, after I fall in love with her?" Kaze spoke helplessly. "Damn it. I won't be the kind of guy who would steal someone's rights. If only you just keep on liking that red-haired teacher…" These were spoken as if he didn't really consider Eriol was there. But then his jade eyes shot the other guy's ones. "Tell me one good reason why you're a better suitor for Tomoyo than me."

"Because I love her," Eriol replied calmly.

Kaze snorted at this. "Dimwit. I love her too. What else?"

At this, Eriol was silenced for some moments. Not long. For then, a soft smile was formed on his face as he spoke. "There's nothing else. Because I love her. Because… even if it costs my own happiness to make her happy, then I will be more than willing to give it all. Because she needed someone to make her happy. And I will be that man,"

"… How confident,"

"Well, just let me prove it,"

"And let you marry her!"

"What? I am her legal fiancée,"

"Tch," Kaze grunted.

Then, before Eriol could realize it, a punch flied at his face and hit him. Hard.

"Argh! What was that for!" Eriol shouted as wiped off the blood from his lips.

"An eye for an eye. Then a punch for a punch, idiot."

"Hey you –"

"If you ever make her sad …" the chestnut-haired man cut. "Then I won't hesitate to come back and claim her. Of course, you'll also receive another punch as a bonus…" He gave Eriol one last glare, before finally turned around and walked away.

Trying not to feel even the slightest guilt and pity towards his love-competitor, Eriol then opened the door to where Tomoyo was waiting and stepped in.

"Tomoyo –"

"I can't do this,"

His head looked up at this. "Can't do what?" he asked, though inside, he already knew what she meant.

"I c-can't do this we-wedding. I-I can't marry you, Eriol…," she stammered in her attempt to prevent the tears from falling.

Tiredly, he walked towards her and grabbed her wrist and instructed her to sit. He was still holding her hands as he also sat on the chair in front of her. Once she had managed to calm herself down, he asked. "Why?"

"I-I don't know. It's just that…Kaze… I…"

"Do you love him, Tomoyo?"

She sighed. "I don't know…"

Holding her hand even more gently, he then took a deep breath. "I know the way of how to get us back to our time,"

She stared at him, waiting.

"Clow Cards," he spoke.

Her brain tried to forget all her previous emotion blurt out and registered what he was going to say. In confusion, she mumbled, "But… didn't you say that they didn't have any connections with our back to the past case?"

"Yes, I had the detailed research of all the 53 cards. There weren't anything related towards our problems. But, there was definitely something with the 54th Card,"

"54th? But I thought –"

"One of the effect of giving Clow Reed some spare time," he sighed. "The 54th Card is the card he planned for me to create it myself,"

"F-for you to create?"

"Clow didn't let me have any memory about this card. He sealed this up, leaving only two to know: Cerberus and Yue. I'm sorry for not telling you earlier, but around the past weeks, Cerberus and Yue from our real time had appeared before me, using Sakura's power, and they told me about all of this."

"Kero-chan and Yue-san?"

He nodded. "The 54th Card is called 'The Bond'. A card Clow designed in order to let me find the pure bond,"

"When we first married, Tomoyo," he continued. "We actually had created 'The Bond'. That Card was incomplete though, for even when we had essentially made a bond with marriage, the bond we had wasn't pure… for it lacked one main thing,"

"Love," she murmured.

"Exactly. The Bond wasn't completed, but it was there, even without your or my realizations. For all the 4 years we spent as a married couple, the card was already created, and sealed somewhere. But remember when we decided to get the divorce? The decision had ruined The Bond's balance and thus it had reacted and dragged us back to this time,"

"So it was because of our intention to have the divorce?"

"Yes,"

"But… The Bond was first created when we got married –that's a kind of sacred ceremony. Then whey did it create chaos even when we only spoken our _plan_ to get divorce?"

"Because all the elements needed to create and to disorient The Bond were there. You and I as the main subjects. Then, our decision to be together …or not to be. Also, the Sun key," he let out the small key from his suit's pocket. "Remember when Nakuru gave it to me just before we announced our will to get a divorce?" Tomoyo nodded slowly. "And of course, the witnesses: Yue and Cerberus. We had all the elements when we first created The Bond by our marriage and when we broke The Bond even by mere sayings,"

"The reason why The Bond sent us back to the time before we got married before we ever first created The Bond…" she spoke slowly. "Was to make us create The Bond once again?"

"Yes,"

"So that means…"

Eriol hid his Sun Key inside his shirt. "Yes, the only way for us to get back to normal is to re-create The Bond card. And thus, yes, with all the elements required completed –left only Yue and Cerberus waiting down at the ceremonial place, what we need to do is to have the marriage… again."

------------------

The following moments passed felt like rapid seconds.

To Tomoyo, it was still hard to ever accept the fact about all that Eriol had said to her.

Like, for almost 16 years, she hadn't really heard anything about Clow Cards. The 53rd card and that was it. Nothing else. But now, she had to face a theory or so that this time she was actually the part in the creating of the 54th Card. And to think such weird card being created by this…

Marriage?

God damn.

She really wanted to bang her head to the wall or just merely ran away right the moment, if not for the 'Here Comes the Bride' song flowed smoothly from the childish voice of the specially-requested Tomoeda Choir that reminded her to keep her mind and heart (and body) to be strong enough to keep strolling gracefully down the aisle.

From the corner of her eyes, she could see Cerberus in her plushie-Kero-mode and Yukito Tsukihiro. Both eyed her with some kind of expectations that she realized she hadn't been aware of at the 'first marriage' she had with Eriol.

She looked beside her, to Kinomoto Fujitaka, who gave her one of his usual reassuring smile. Tomoyo smiled back, and was calmed for some split moments, just before she got her gaze at her 'future husband'.

One thing that may be the best (or perharps, worst) spice in this hectic drama was probably that dark haired guy dressed even more handsomely in that dark blue suit.

When Fujitaka handed Tomoyo to her 'groom', and Eriol's hand gripped gently yet strongly at hers, it was even harder to wipe off the urge to runaway. The young man seemed to realize this, as he pulled her closer to him (close and abrupt enough to make some women squealed in their delighted romantic fantasy) and whispered, "This is the only way. Bear it,"

Slowly nodding, she then turned to face the priest who seemed old enough to be her grandfather. The priest started with some love poetry before he continued with the ceremony.

She hadn't kept track on what the whole marital ceremony stuffs until she heard Eriol spoke, "I do."

The remaining was like a familiar yet strange chant for her.

"Do you, Tomoyo Daidouji, take Eriol Hiiragizawa as your lawfully husband in health and sickness, riches and poor, and whatever that comes in between?"

She…

"I do," her voice came out stronger than she had expected it to be.

Somehow, she felt rather better now.

And yes… she started to feel it. The swift kind of wind that she knew must have relation to whatever magic that had gotten them stuck here.

Tomoyo realized that the process went up slower than when the first time she and Eriol were dragged back to the past. The priest still had time to continue with some of his speech about 'standing up for those who thought this couple shouldn't be together', the rings exchange, and finally…

"You may kiss your bride,"

One the thing that had made Tomoyo sort off agreed with continuing this wedding ceremony was his promise that he would never kiss her on the lips. She found it pretty fair, or at least, should be.

But when Eriol bent down a little to close for her comfort, she realized that this sorcerer –yes as good as he seemed – had the tendency to be out of the expectations, which, in this case, turned out to be the sudden lip lock.

Her eyes widened in panic, as his lips savored hers in a passionate kiss –one that screamed out anything except mere desire and everything about…

She didn't even have the courage to think of some certain L word.

Then, she felt the wind rushed faster and stronger towards her and Eriol, and the queer feeling like being dragged to a black hole was there again.

It was working!

Eriol ended his kiss and stared at the raven haired lady.

"You lied about the kiss," she murmured.

And as the blackness started to engulf them, she could still see him grinned childishly.

_Damn you, cute bastard._

Then she blacked out.

**TBC**

a/N: I JUST WANT TO BANG MY HEAD TO THE WALL… Oh My God, I did ruin this chapter, didn't I? Please review, and being honest with me won't make me discontinue this fic. (okay, LAME update… but…) So if you think this fic sucks, then just say… I'm open to flames…


	7. Of Denial and Acception

Disclaimer: I don't own CCS.

Bolds + italics thoughts

**Once and Again**

.Chapter 7. Of Denial and Acception

Before Tomoyo could really flutter her eyes opened after her long blackout, she had already received a bone-crashing hug as the first greetings.

"Ooh… you're finally awake, Tomoyo-sama! You've got me really worried!"

"Na-Nakuru?" Her voice sounded husky from the lack of use. "Where… how…"

"Actually, you got all of us worried! Eriol-sama got his consciousness back long before you do. We were afraid that since you don't really have any magic that you couldn't pass this phase and –Ooh, I'm honestly really glad you're okay! I mean, you're okay, right? You don't feel any headache or pain anywhere or…"

"I'm perfectly fine, Nakuru. But thank you for worrying. Anyway, where's –"

"Could you leave us for some moment, Ruby Moon?" the voice came suddenly as his tall figure came approaching the bed Tomoyo was in. She looked up to see Eriol took a seat on a chair beside the bed. Be it his way to play his 'mysterious-guy-suddenly-appeared' role or not, but she found out that he did that often these following times. Not that she really complained, but…

"I need to have a talk with Tomoyo," he explained.

"No problem, Eriol-sama. Do I need to prepare the dinner?" said the moon guardian as walking out of the room.

"That would be great, thank you," Eriol replied.

It was after Nakuru was out the room and the door went closed, was that Tomoyo took a real gaze at her surrounding. The bed, the wall, the furniture's positions…

"We're...actually back," she murmured.

"Yes…"

"God, it's been almost 2 months, ne?"

"Yes. But don't worry. The time flows slower here. Though we have been through 2 months in that time lapse, we actually only spent a couple of days in the real time."

She nodded relieved. "Ne, Eriol? About this Bond Card… where is it anyway?"

"Safely kept on the Books of Cards. Have just checked it. Why?"

"Hmm…I'm still confused. The Bond Card reacted and dragged us back to the past because we had the will to divorce and having all the requirements there. So, does it mean that if we have those again, we will be dragged back to our past again?"

He sighed. "No. I guess not. Now that I know what the clause was, I can prevent the Bond Card to distort us back to the past. Will be simple enough, actually. Being the card's master, I only need to change the way the card works."

"So that means that even if we'll have that divorce, the past incident won't happen, right?"

"… right."

She exhaled a breath. "Good to know,"

Eriol glanced to her side, trying to comprehend what she did mean. Almost hesitantly, he then asked, "Tomoyo… Do you…really want to divorce?"

His question caught her in a trance. Turning her head to gaze at his sapphire eyes, she attempted to find any sure thing from this enigmatic husband of hers. "I don't know," she finally murmured. "Do you?"

Before he could give her any answer, her cell phone rang –pulling the tension away. Tomoyo took her slim cell phone from the night stand, partially glad and disappointed for the timing of the call. It appeared that she had picked up the call without really realizing, until the person from the other line spoke.

"Tomoyo?"

"Ka –" but she cancelled calling out his name for some reason. Tomoyo's eyes scanned nervously towards Eriol –who all so sudden had this displeased expression on his face. Clearing her throat in discomfort, the raven haired woman then got off her bed and walked to the corner so that Eriol wouldn't be able to hear the conversation, and then continued speaking in smaller voice. "What is it?"

Tomoyo knew that she was being a bit paranoid, but ever since she saw the confrontation between Kaze and Eriol back then at the wedding she had just re-experienced, she just had the feeling that it would be better if both of the guys stayed away from each other as far as possible.

"…My flight to London is settled,"

She almost choked a 'what flight?' question, but once she remembered the situation was before they went back to the time 4 previous years, and that was… about Kaze's departure, she quickly cancelled her mouth for saying it.

The Araide man continued, "Meet me at Tomoeda airport before 8 pm tomorrow. If you show up, that means that I can still have my hope for you. But if you don't, I will consider that it's the sign for me to retreat and forget my love to you,"  
"What! Kaze, you –"  
He hung up the phone.

"Damn it!" cursed the woman. She started to press the button to dial Kaze's number, before Eriol grabbed her cell phone and turned it off.

"Don't you even dare thinking to go," he said coldly.

She was perplexed as for why could he hear the conversation, when she was sure that it would be impossible for him to do, before Tomoyo realized that this was Hiiragizawa Eriol she was talking. Yes, him and his gifted (cursed?) magical ability. Of course, he could hear what Kaze had said to her. It was even possible for him to hear any conversation he wanted in the 30 miles radius if he really wanted to.

Crossing her arms in front of her chest, she then murmured, "It was supposed to be private. And you really don't have any right to decide whether I'm going or not,"

"Yes I still do have the authority. You're not going to see that bastard, and that's final."

Sometimes Tomoyo just wanted to punch the both men for always setting up ultimatums for her. Who did they think she was? A mere robot who always obeyed her master's command?

"Tomoyo… I do this for you,"

She tried to hold back her anger –which really, had been going harder and harder each time they confronted. In a tired fashion, she asked, "What? Eriol, you're not doing this for me. You're doing it for yourself. Or for your ego, I don't know. My analyst is that you're feeling insecure since 'something' that has usually been 'yours' is slowly… being not yours anymore. You're just like a kid with a toy that he doesn't really like, and you pay no attention to that toy until some other kid just grabs it from you, and your selfishness just had the urge to never give it up,"

"No, Tomoyo. I-"

"Am I mere play thing to you Eriol? One that when you're bored again with me, you'll just dump me again?"

"No. It's not like that in any way. You're not a –"

She raised her hand –silencing him. "Stop. I've… had enough."

He stared at her. And boy, she hated it. His gaze was still unreadable.

"…Please leave me alone for some moment, Eriol."

The bespectacled guy looked like he was about to say something, but cancelled it. He slowly nodded and walked to the door.

"You're never a toy for me, Tomoyo," he murmured as closing the door.

Leaving the amethyst-eyed beauty cried out her sudden urge to cry –cuddled in her bed alone.

----------------------

"Men can be jerk some times," spoke Nakuru as she tried to crunch her hard cookies. "Okay, most times. Don't worry, this ain't your fault. Do what you want, don't let those boys take control of you. Cookies, Tomoyo-sama? Or would you prefer the doughnuts?"

Sighing, Tomoyo then spoke, "I don't even know what I want,"

"Well, the doughnuts are definitely easier to chew, but the cookies are well – … Oh! You didn't mean it about these cakes, eh?"

Tomoyo shook her head with a small smile –glad enough that even in the turmoil, she still had Nakuru around. "…I just can't understand why he changes so suddenly,"

"Er…since you're contemplating about 2 men now, just which one do you mean?"

"Eriol,"

"Ow. Master… Yeah, he's changed. Being not dumb enough, I presume."

"Huh?"

Nakuru sighed at her vain attempt to chew on the super-hard cookies. "Meaning, that it took quite some time even for a man like him –sheesh, and to think he is called the prodigy –to finally realizes what he's searching for is already his, since so long ago," the moon guardian then looked seriously to her mistress. "You,"

"What? Don't tell me you're proposing the idea that Eriol might be –"

"Madly in love with you? Yes,"

Tomoyo snorted. "But that's absurd!"

"In which part do you call it absurd?"

"Everything! Nakuru, For 4 damn years, he's being my husband, in which he had ignored and betrayed me all along. Tell me, if he really had loved me, why would he have done any of those affairs? Why did he have to hurt me every time?"

"Tomoyo-sama, Eriol-sama had never really meant it. We all know that even genius could turn out to be a complete idiot when it involves love –especially when it involves love."

"But –"

"People always think that I am an idiot, Tomoyo-sama, but I have some analytical assumptions," Ruby Moon's false form spoke with such intellect poise –one that would only make his sun companion snickered mockingly. "One is that my dear master was just plainly too stupid to realize that he loved you. Second, he was just afraid to admit that he might have fallen in love with you even from the very beginning. You know, being Clow's reincarnation sometimes made him think that he needed to do things Clow did, or love the woman Clow did. Which was wrong, of course. Uhm, no offense to Kaho-san…" Nakuru cleared her throat before continuing, "Third, Eriol-sama just wanted to hide his real feelings –he always had the tendencies to do that,"

Nakuru then smiled. "Either way, Tomoyo-sama… I don't know when and how it started, but he has grown feelings for you. He IS in love with you now. And honestly, I've never really thought that he really loved Kaho-san. It's different, the way he looks at you… I mean, you're not stupid, Tomoyo-sama. I'm sure that you can sense it too. But sometimes, you're just too stubborn to admit it,"

There was silence after that. Nakuru soon filled it with her paused eating activity, but stopped again when Tomoyo decided to speak.

"I'm afraid. What if he only thinks of me as a prize to conquer? Once he manages to convince me, he would just hurt me again,"

"Master may be a jerk, but he won't ever do that again. Do have faith in him, Tomoyo-sama. Give him another chance,"

Suddenly, Tomoyo remembered the thing that her mother said before her wedding.

_"To find your own happiness… Are you ready for that? … Do you really want it?"_

-----------------------

It was later that day that Tomoyo realized one other effect of finally being able to go back to their righteous time: being under the same roof with the Hiiragizawa again.

Of course, it would never been a problem, if only they hadn't had the whole tension between them. It wasn't that she hated Eriol, but thinking that she had all the high possibility to meet him anywhere and anytime when she was at the highest point in avoiding the mage, was really nerve-cracking.

Like that time, when she finally decided to just get out of her bedroom sanctuary and walked down to the kitchen –where, yes, Eriol was there with his black coffee.

She didn't want to be (or look or sound) awkward to him after their latest encounter, so with the calmest voice she managed to let out, she greeted him, "Hi,"

Which, on the opposite, turned out to be more awkward –since Eriol merely glanced at her.

Tomoyo didn't know how long she had been standing there on the kitchen way, until she finally heard Eriol cleared his throat and mentioned her to sit in front of him.

He didn't look or say anything to her for some time, before he finally sighed and gazed at her and shot her the straight question.

"Can you still give me another chance?"

The conversation she had with Nakuru earlier that day suddenly made its way again to her mind. "I…"

Before she could say anything, he had gently taken her hands and enveloped them in his warmth. Smiling genuinely, the dark-haired sorcerer spoke. "Tomoyo…"

**_Don't say it, don't say it…_**

"I love you," he murmured.

3 words that sent her barriers to crumble down again.

Droplets of tears fell down.

Eriol gently wiped them all off and slowly tilted her chin up so that his sapphire eyes could gaze at her amethyst ones –letting her see, just how serious he was, that he meant every word that he had just said.

And what Tomoyo hated the most, was that she could see it too. He was right. There was sincerity there…

Could she…

Forgive him?

After all his betrayal?

Trust him again?

After him sending her heartbroken for thousand times?

And God, love him again?

After all… after all…

…

…

There came the most frightening silence in her life… or in his life too.

She needed to decide.

"Tomoyo?"

Her throat felt dry, and it almost hurt to say anything. So she closed her eyes and slowly nodded.

Slowly, there was the warm smile again on his handsome face. Giving her a peck on the lips, Eriol then murmured, "Thank you,"

-------------

"Aah… don't you think it's sweet, Suppi-chan?" sighed Nakuru as the two guardian hid in between the shadow.

The feline didn't say a word, and just gazed at the couple.

Something was still not right.

But he'd save the thought to himself for the night. He loved his master too much to ruin his new found happiness.

TBC

A/n : okay, rushing and rushing. Am I going too fast? Did I make the characters inhuman and unreal? Twists waiting in the next chapter… This story is really nearing the end… review?


	8. Happiness

Disclaimer: I don't own CCS

Italics + bolds thoughts

**Once and Again**

_.Chapter 8. Happiness_

It had never been part of her imagination to ever have Eriol greeted her first thing and bringing her a tray of breakfast in bed the next morning.

"Morning," he grinned as giving a peck on Tomoyo's cheek.

Apparently, the Daidouji co. heiress was too stunned to say anything. She was definitely not used of any kind of this sudden perfect-husband attitude.

"I know this all may seem awkward, but I just want to prove it to you that we can actually have a good and honest relationship," he stated.

"Uhm…yeah," and after some moment Tomoyo slowly smiled. The whole thing may have been odd, but Eriol had tried, and so would she. "Of course."

"Thank you. Now, you may as well try the pancakes. Made it myself," he claimed proudly before the husband-and-wife started to eat the breakfast. It was later after they finished the meal that the Hiiragizawa man spoke again, "Hey, as the sign to begin our new relationship, why don't we go together tonight?"

She _really _was not used to such adores and romances. But it wasn't a bad thing, and she almost said yes, if not for the sudden realization that hit. "Oh no. I'm sorry. Can't do it tonight,"

His smile faded. "Why not?"

"Kaze. He'll be leaving tonight," and as if having the sudden struck of thoughts, she quickly jumped off her bed. "Oh My God, and I have to–"

"You're not going, are you, Tomoyo?"

Silence.

The woman sighed. There they went again with this debate. "Why not?" she asked back in return.

There seemed to be another changing in responding things, because Eriol wasn't as fierce as he used to when they were talking about this whole Kaze 'discussion'. "Tomoyo? … I will really appreciate it if you stop seeing that Araide guy,"

"But Eriol, he's my friend. And he's leaving to London tonight. We might not see each other for a long time, and…" she sighed. "I just _have_ to go,"

"So that he might still think that he has the chance to get you? I don't think so," spoken referring to the ultimatum the emerald-eyed guy had given just the day before. "I just don't want him to distract you. We've planned to start a good relationship all over again and I don't think giving high hopes to another guy will be an option to help our plan,"

"Please, Eriol. I just want to –"

"I'm doing this to save our marriage,"

"Of course. But I just need to see him and say my farewell and –"

"You don't want to save our marriage," he quickly concluded.

"No, No! I DO want to save our marriage! It's just that –"

**_You still love him_**, Eriol thought bitterly.

But it never meant that THE Hiiragizawa backed out. He needed Tomoyo, and he couldn't imagine himself losing the very first woman that he might ever loved.

"I'm not letting you go. You're not going, Tomoyo."

"But Eriol –"

He suddenly took her in his warm embrace. "I don't want to lose you,"

Her eyes stung. She swore, that really, no guy could ever flip her feelings upside down, mend and break her heart at the same time, the way Hiiragizawa Eriol did. Not even Kaze could. She wanted to hug him back, but on the other hand, the urge to push him away was just as strong.

"You're not making this easier for me, Eriol…"

He felt her tears started to fall on his shirt, and that was when he decided to let her out of his embrace. Inside, he cursed himself. Why everything he did could only end up hurting her? Slowly, he got up and stared at her with again his unreadable gaze. But whatever the gaze truly meant, if it was to wrench her heart even more, than he did a successful job in it.

------------------------

In any other occasion, it was quite a disgrace if a Daidouji woman cried over something and let her emotion opened up and being vulnerable at the same time. What Tomoyo had just realized, that she had actually created that mishaps for herself very frequently nowadays. She hated it. As a Daidouji, she must be the one who could handle any problem calmly and effectively. But it seemed to be that all those business strategies or even all her families' teachings wouldn't do much to get this unpleasant feeling out of her heart. And truthfully, it was eating her sanity from the inside.

She glanced up at the clock. 3 hours before Kaze's departure. And she still had some urgent thing to decide, between going to meet Kaze or just stay back with Eriol. Tomoyo knew that whatever she would choose would bring a changing in her future life.

Referring back to the memory when she fist met Kaze back then at college. She had been one of the student body committee, and he… well, he was the guy who was famous for his rebel. At the first encounter, none had showed any kind of chemistry –and not even a care to remember each other's name. But time passed by and friendship bond started to form. Sharing warm friendship for a long time, where she would always remember him as the guy who was often misinterpreted wrongly, but a good guy none the less. Caring, with a little sarcastic attitude, she must say that it was hard not to fall in love with this dear friend.

Years had passed when the two denied the growing new feeling until the girl decided (being decided) to get married, that the feelings started to flood out.

It was the kind of suppressed emotion, one that was better not shown… and now, finally, after all of those years of hiding and denying, Tomoyo could actually have the chance to release all of it…

Then… Eriol. Such a remarkable Clow's incarnation, the perfect English gentleman she knew back then in the fifth grade. A guy with a mischievous mind hidden well behind the polite smile. Their relationship had never been more than mere acquaintance until finally the two got engaged. Though so, romance was still far out of the context for 4 years –at least not until the magical event happened that later would be the turnout of all the circumstances. He had behaved very kindly, and even let her to see more of his usually enigmatic self –be it the bad or the good one. And once they let the honesty seeped out, Tomoyo couldn't help but having the feeling that the 4 years could have actually passed better –that having Eriol as a husband wasn't something she ever needed to regret.

He created a new feeling inside her, showering her with warmth, passion, protection, and yes… love.

She would definitely be lying if she ever said that nothing changed in her heart.

Yet again, Kaze and Eriol were similar in some way. Both were kind, overly protective and didn't want to lose her just as much as she didn't want to lose any of them.

She loved them both but in a different matter. She knew that one of them couldn't receive the kind of love that he wanted from her.

But admitting it… was something she really, really wanted to avoid. Oh, if only she didn't have to make such tough decision. Well, never in her life, would Tomoyo imagine herself having to decide on such things. She was never one in the spotlight. If the whole life was a big drama, then she would only be the minor role –with lack of conflict. And that was why she had never envied Sakura for always having all the attention given. To her, it was better to be 'invisible' and had a normal, peaceful life.

But things weren't always the way she would like them to be.

Hating herself even more than the situation that she was in, she gave up once again into another frustrated sobs.

-------------------------

"She still locked herself up in her room?"

Nakuru shook her head. "Yes, Master,"

"Is she …still crying?"

"I guess not. But she is still very depressed,"

Eriol gritted his teeth. "Damn it. I'm gonna check her up,"

"No, no, master! I think it would be better if you give her some more time…" the moon guardian said.

"But –"

"I abhor myself for saying this, but I think the idiot is right, Eriol-sama." the Sun feline suddenly spoke as he lifted his gaze up from the book he was reading.

Sighing, Eriol decided to take the advice from his guardians and slammed his body down on his throne of evil. The silence that came soon after seemed too unpleasant for the moon guardian to handle, so she cleared her throat and excused herself to the kitchen to make tea and prepare some snacks, leaving her master with her fellow guardian.

Spinel still had his eyes to the thick book, but not letting his mind absorbing the content, for he waited for what his master wanted so much to say. Spinel didn't want to push him, but it could happen any minute now…

"Am I making a mistake, Spinel?" the sorcerer finally asked.

Still keeping the book in front of his petite body, the Sun Guardian then slowly answered, "Well… one thing for sure, you're surely distracting Tomoyo-sama's mind very much," and when the master didn't give any other comment, the feline continued, "By all your suddenly possessive behavior. You must have confused her a lot,"

"I'm only doing it to save our marriage… It is getting to a good turn point and I won't risk it for anything,"

"Well…" Spinel murmured darkly as finally closing up the book. "On the other hand, Eriol-sama. You may have risked it…." " Or you may have not," he added after an afterthought.

"I love her, Spinel…"

"I know that. Even without anything that happened during when you two dragged back to the past, I had had the feeling that your love was starting to grow. But is it the same way with Tomoyo-sama? That is one thing that we still haven't found out,"

"I… I know that I've been very stupid in the past for ever ignoring her, for almost letting her go. But now I won't do the same mistake. I'll keep the love, and fight for it. Is that wrong?"  
"Nothing wrong with that, Eriol-sama… It's just that… I think…if you want to love, you don't always have to fight to keep her as yours…"

"… Are you saying that I should have… let her go with that Araide guy?"

"IF it's the best option for her _and _for you, then…yes, I think so,"

Eriol suddenly stood up and snapped at the poor little panther. "I won't give up on her! I can take a good care of her! God, I even promised that bastard that I will be the only man that can make her happy and –" he was suddenly silenced, after realizing what the later statement meant.

Still with such enigmatic aura, Spinel flied closer to his master. "It is always hard to fight for your love, Eriol-sama. But it is always harder to ever let go of it,"

"…But –"

"If you're really concerned about her happiness… then –"

The library door suddenly swung opened, and there on the doorway, stood the beautiful lady that had been the object of the talk.

"T-Tomoyo? W-what are you doing here?" Eriol asked in surprise.

The amethyst-eyed woman blinked, as if not completely sure how on the world she could end up standing there. "I… I have been thinking, Eriol…" she trailed off.

Eriol walked closer to her, and that was when he saw it all on her eyes. Fear, anxiety, despair, and at the same time … determination.

_**Don't say it…**._

"And I…have decided… " Tomoyo slowly said. "And I choose –"

"Don't say it!!" Eriol suddenly snapped. He didn't mean to yell at her, but he just… damn it, he just didn't want to hear her even say that bastard's name…. Fury took a slight control of him, but he quickly regretted it as seeing more pain in her eyes.

He was always good in hurting her, wasn't he?

"Tomoyo, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that, I –" he didn't continue, but hugging her tightly instead.

Then all seemed like a flashback for him.

Back at the 5th grade, when they first met… he didn't think much about her. She was just another ordinary girl that could be a little help to him to make Sakura transformed all the cards. She was the charming little girl, but he didn't see about her much back then. Until when he showed him her honest observation, her sincere heart, that he grew more respect and astonishment to this magic-less girl –one thing that was rare for him. Then, years passed…and Daidouji Tomoyo with Hiiragizawa Eriol could never be more than a mere friend with all the politeness and same mischievous mind. She was starting to be one of the woman he cared the most, and that was why he didn't decline the offer Sonomi had for her. To him, she was such a nice girl, and if it was protection that she needed, he would give it. But lust and slight idiocy clouded his heart, as he continuously betrayed her for 4 years long. Yet… she was always there.

When they were 'cursed' to get back to their past, she helped him to start all the honesty, yes, one thing that embarrassed him, it was always her who helped him. She opened his eyes, she showed him the greatest loyalty and care and… some sense to make him realize that yes, he was always in love with Daidouji Tomoyo… even with him being incredibly stupid not to realize it anytime sooner.

She was his sunshine, his angel, his love, his everything…

Cupping her chin slowly, he then planted the gentlest kiss on her lips. It didn't last long.

"E-Eriol?" Tomoyo questioned.

Instead of replying, he then firmly grabbed her arm and instructed her to follow her. She was starting to give protests –which got ignored, as he walked with her to the garage and ordered her to get into the car. And yes, she hated it again, it was the same unreadable gaze that he had on his eyes. She could never guess whatever the purpose of all of these.

"Wh-where are we going?" she dared to ask as his black car strolled on the night street.

He never gave her the answer, and remained quiet for the rest of the journey. After some failed attempt, Tomoyo decided to just shut her mouth up and waited for whatever was it that the Clow's reincarnation had in mind. At least, she trusted him enough for that.

After some time riding, she began to recognize where the car was heading.

_**But it couldn't be that, couldn't it?**_

The car speeded up, earning honks from the other cars, until finally Eriol stopped the car at the parking lot. He killed the engine and quickly got out of the car to open the door for her.

She didn't hop up, but instead asking, "Eriol? Wha … Why are we in here?"

He glanced at his wristwatch and then spoke, "His plane takes off on 8, right?"

"Kaze's? Yes, he –"

"Then you'd better hurry up," he calmly said as once again grabbing her wrist and ran to the airport building with her.

Tomoyo was too shocked to even say anything. Soon, they entered the airport, and after instructing her to wait for a moment, he dashed off to the departure information and asked the young boy there.

"Gate 27. Not far," Eriol muttered as he held her hand and guided the way. He stopped walking before the entrance of the waiting area for the referred gate and then turned around and for the first time stared at her confused eyes. He then smiled warmly.

"Our marriage…" she asked slowly. "Didn't you say you–"

"I know. But Tomoyo, after all of the mistakes I've done to you, I couldn't bear to hurt you even more. You are too precious to me. Our marriage…is my biggest mistake I have ever done to you, and I…" he paused for a moment. "And that's why I'm letting you go,"

"What –"

"We can deal with all the divorcing formalities later," he then chuckled. "But don't worry. I'll make sure that The Bond card wouldn't do anything disturbing anymore. Though I must say, I really got to be grateful to that card… for making me learn about my mistake –in some way,"

"…"

"Hey, cheer up. You don't have to pity me. I'm okay," Eriol sighed.

"… Why? Why are you doing this?" her voice was barely louder than a whisper.

He stroked her ivory cheek tenderly and then slowly walked to the space back her and gave her a gentle hug from behind.

"Because… I love you. And I know that you love that Araide, and even so I had… yeah, selfishly claiming you as mine after all of those terrible things I have done to you,"

Her throat then felt very, very dry.

"Seems like I've never stopped to hurt you," he continued. "And even it is impossible to pay you back for all your gentleness for me –which I honestly think I would have never deserved – I want to at least be able to make you smile even for once,"

Eriol then bent down to her ear level and then whispered at her, "Find your happiness, Tomoyo."

Her heart skipped a beat, and she turned around to see him, but he was already gone from the spot he was just on the previous seconds.

"Eriol? Eriol?!"

Her eyes began to search for his figure between the floods of peoples in panic. .

He wasn't anywhere in sight.

"No… Eriol –"

"Tomoyo?"

She spun her body to the voice's source.

"Kaze…"

The jade-eyed man sighed in relief and then pulled the woman into her arms. "Thank goodness. I thought I would lose you,"

-----------------------

"Master?"

"Yes, Ruby Moon?"

"I hate Greenland in winter. Why do we have to suddenly move here? And where's Tomoyo-sama? Why is she –"

"Ruby Moon… shut up," said the other guardian. The feline then turned to his master. "Why… you're doing this, Eriol-sama?"

The Hiiragizawa guy stared at the snowing view outside the window on his new manor and remained silent.

The guardians stared at each other before finally the Moon guardian spoke again, "Do you regret what you're doing, Eriol-sama?"

He then smiled softly. "I only regret that I couldn't see her smile for one last time,"

"But –"

"Spinel, you're right. It is even harder to let go the person you love, than to fight to get her,"

"Eriol-sama… are you alright?"

He paused before he exhaled a breath. "… I will,"

Then suddenly a piece of his past got into his mind. It was when he had once questioned why Tomoyo would sacrifice herself that much for somebody else.

That time, she had answered, "Because of love,"

And remembering that, he knew that he had a reason why he would sacrifice his happiness for her.

**_As long as you are happy, then I'll be happy too._**

-----

Not the end.


	9. Case of Idiocy

Disclaimer: I don't own CCS

**Once and Again**

.Chapter 9. Case of Idiocy

"…Yeah, yeah. Okay. I'll go home as fast as I could find your specially requested custard cream. Get rest and don't move too much," Eriol's eyes traveled to the upper section of the shelves in that supermarket.

"Suuuree, Eriol-sama! Get back home soon!!" and the hyperactive Nakuru disconnected the call.

He put back the cell phone inside his coat's pocket and stroll the trolley down on the corridor of the supermarket. Afternoon shopping had somehow become part of his routine the couple of months back. Not that he complained. It had been much more peaceful here in London. What he remembered, in Tomoeda, he had always been busied handling his counseling company, and tired himself with countless big projects until late at night. Now that he had given over the management of the big company to his trusted men and thus made his earning 'only' by the stocks he had on the company (and he wouldn't protest, since the income made by the stocks had more than provided a simple, comfortable life in London), he had finally had the chance to spend 3 hours lazily in the public library or to played the newest game downloaded from the internet from dusk until dawn. Spinel had said that he was wasting his time over, but Eriol's retort was that all these were required to reach the tranquility of mind.

At that, the Sun Guardian didn't have another word against. Among all, he and Nakuru were the ones who knew how much priceless a tranquility of mind for their master at the times.

Mostly, after him deciding to leave his life in Tomoeda.

His love.

Eriol snapped his thoughts away. He wasn't flying himself miles away from Tomoeda just to remember his old life.

Just to remember her…

But he couldn't deny it. Through the distances were made, it seemed just as hard to get that peace of mind.

His heart still ached, and sometimes he would play dumb just to numb his senses. He would go and place that goofy smile of him at day, spending times until the next morning at the night club, doing everything –_anything_ – to get her out of his mind.

Even after 10 months not seeing her, she still haunted him. Every breathing seconds…

The funny and scary thing was he seemed to start having imaginations. Like seeing her on this supermarket here in London, walking her trolley to his direction, fresh and warm –like spring breeze…

"Long time no see, Eriol."

He blinked his indigo eyes a few times, and almost let out a sarcastic chuckle.

Good, she haunted him until here?!

With the suddenly hoarse voice and rigid posture, he greeted back to the fine woman in front of him. "Yes… long time no see, Tomoyo."

---

"Hot Latte, please," she said gracefully to the waiter at the small café nearby.

"And you, Sir?"

"Black coffee,"

The waiter took the order and then soon left the two reunited alone.

London was cloudy that day. Rain will pour down soon, he thought as letting his eyes gazed up at the sky outside –practically doing anything except looking at the woman seated on the chair in front.

"Sakura's daughter would turn 6 month next week. You'll come back to Tomoeda for the celebration, won't you?" she asked lightly as the opening of the conversation.

At the thought of being polite, he turned his attention towards her and replied, "Yes. I have promised her to,"

"Great. You really should see Tsubaki-chan. She's such an adorable baby. You'd definitely fall in love with her,"

"Of course," he replied flatly.

Silence enveloped them both.

"So… how's life?" she asked after a couple of deafening silence passed.

"Fine,"

"Work?"

"Fine,"

"Spinel and Nakuru –"

" –are just fine,"

"And you?"

"…"

The waiter then appeared again, placing down both' orders and left after asking if he could get them anything else –which was politely refused by Tomoyo.

He took a sip on his coffee, and she could only examine him.

"Still addicted to caffeine, I see,"

"Can't live without it," he finally provided her with a longer reply. "So…what business brings you here?"

"Kaze wants to enlarge the distribution of his company here. And I help him doing the research before he could start the business."

To Eriol's dismay, he could still feel his back stiffened at the mention of _his _name. "I see. Lover's business, eh?"

Tomoyo looked at him straight in the eyes and soon caught the sentiment he had. Exhaling a breath, she then spoke again. "We aren't lovers,"

"Husband and wife, then?"

"Good friends. Nothing more than good friends," she sipped on her warming latte.

He eyed her in doubt, but decided not to press her on the subject… at least not at this current second. Glancing at the raining view, he then sighed. "I can't stay long. I have to go now," he spoke in a flat tone. Eriol knew he was… somewhat pathetic, but he just couldn't face Tomoyo right now. _This is all so soon, too soon…_ Standing up and putting some amount of money for both orders, he quickly put on his coat and muttered quickly, "Meet you at Sakura's daughter –"

"Eriol," she called for him.

He paused.

Tomoyo rested her suddenly weary back on the cushion behind her. Her calm visage slowly turned into a tired one. Slowly, she began, "Do you really hate me?"

So stunned he was at her question, that he didn't answer her.

"I've been… looking for you, Eriol. Some first months after your sudden disappearance, I practically bugged people asking for your presence, "she chuckled in cynic. "Until one day I realized that you just didn't want to see me anymore, that I stopped searching. But I had hope, Eriol. I said to myself that if we really meant to be together, then it would be God's way and we would find our path toward each other,"

"And now we've met," she continued –her amethyst eyes conveyed between the light of hope and plain sinister.

She didn't continue her words, and he assumed that she was waiting for him to say anything.

"Tomoyo, I… –"

_I just don't want to hurt you again…_

" –I can't…"

Her gaze was stoic as she cut his words. "I understand. Silly me to think that we could start it all over again," standing up gracefully she then walked passed him towards the café's exit. "Only, Eriol… Back then at the airport, I didn't go with Kaze,"

Something in his heart tinged. "…Why?"

"Because I chose you, idiot."

His eyes widened at that and when he turned around, Tomoyo had exited the café.

At the distant, he could hear Nakuru's words to him some time ago.

_"Don't throw away your chance and the chance of the person that you love to be happy by just mere idiocy, Eriol-sama,"_

_"Are you calling me an idiot, Ruby Moon?"_

_"Honestly, Master? Yes, you're the epitome of the idiocy itself,"_

"Damn it," he muttered under his breath when noticing that she was no longer in sight. Eriol was not quite finished with the grumping, but the cell phone inside his pocket had rung. Hesitantly he answered it. "Yes?"

"Hey. It's me,"

----

"You know I hate this kind of thing, Kaze,"

The Araide guy laughed heartedly at her raven haired friend. "Come on, Tomoyo. One marriage failure doesn't mean that you have to lock yourself up for the rest of your life,"

"But you know I hate blind date. It hadn't gone well the last time you hooked me up with just another of your comrades,"

"That had been my mistake, but trust me with this one, Tomoyo. Just give it a shot, okay?" Kaze said as ruffling her ebony locks. "Got to go now. Emily's waiting. You do good, okay?"

"Geez, I'm almost 30 and yet you still treat me like that,"

Kaze grinned and began to walk away.

"Kaze,"

"Hn?"

She stared intently at him, and he had known her enough to understand what she was going to say.

"Of course, Tomoyo. We're always be friends forever,"

A smile graced her lips. It had always been claming to know that even though Kaze had already had a fiancée, he would always be there for her, as she would do too for him.

"Say hi to Emily from me. Tell her that she could do her gown's fitting tomorrow,"

"Will do,"

"And remind me to kick your ass if you mess it with the blind date this time,"

"Just say the prayer yourself, Daidouji," he grinned as walking out of the fancy restaurant. She smiled slowly, and was planning to return to her window-gazing activity, but the deep voice she heard next prevented her to.

"Such a waste for the fine lady to spend time alone,"

Her eyes glazed coldly at the dark haired man who was now sitting very comfortably at the in front of her. "I would have someone accompany me in a couple of moments. So, mind to get off, Hiiragizawa? You're sitting on his chair,"

"Ah. But I've got this special invitation to escort a certain Daidouji lady. So I am at the right place afterall,"

After noting herself to give Kaze a smack for setting her up with someone whom she really didn't want to meet, Tomoyo calmly spoke to the bespectacled man. "I never mean it to be rude, Eriol. But honestly, if this is your idea of having fun by annoying a person, then sorry, count me out," she said as standing up preparing to leave, only stopped when his hand held her wrist.

"Please don't go,"

She felt really fed up. _Of all times… _Sighing, "What do you want?"

He slowly smiled. "Protecting you, seeing your smile, making you happy, comforting you… Doing anything as long as it is with you and for you alone…In short, being with you again, Tomoyo."

"Why would you?"

"Because I love you,"

She chuckled darkly. Why he said it now? Why not back in their marriage time? Why not back then in the airport? Why not just a few hours ago?! "Damn it, Eriol. You don't even know me,"

"… you're right. Other than the way you smile when you're designing the clothes, or the way you hum Disney's song when you're cooking, or the way your nose wrinkle in dislike when tasting black coffee, or when you secretly weep at the silly soap opera you watch on Sunday morning," he grinned before continuing, "Or when you cry yourself to sleep in night because of me, or when you have those content smile when we actually do stuffs together, and… many, many other things… yes, Tomoyo. I might not know you that much," he paused and giving her a small box. "But I want to find out more of you,"

The lilac eyed woman opened the box in slight stutter. Her eyes then widened.

"And I want you to be my wife once again, Tomoyo."

Inside the box, was a simple-shaped diamond ring.

Her old wedding ring.

"Marry me, Tomoyo."

-----

"Hiiragizawa, your next client's session will begin in 5 minutes. Quickly say goodbye to your wife and do your job," whispered the half-aged lady to her staff.

Mouthing the words 'a moment' to his aged boss, Kotori-san, with the extra topping another Hiiragizawa's smile, Eriol then spoke back to his cell phone. "I'll be home a bit late tonight, Hon. Tell Kaze-chan that I'll go watch his baseball play tomorrow. He's asleep? Well, kiss him goodnight for me…"

"Hiiragizawa…" Kotori-san warned more as impatiently tapping her shoes, but giving up for some moment as she decided to sit and read the magazine instead.

"You bought new lingerie? Nice. Just make sure you're still awake when I'm home, okay? Oh, and wear those Manolo's shoes, Hon. Love seeing you in it. See you later," he then ended up the call. "Sorry, Kotori-san. But I –"

"Don't worry. I'm pretty much used to your lovey dovey. Now, do your job and hare a secret or two to the not so lucky couple," said Kotori-san as she walked out of his office to call Eriol's next client.

The dark haired man looked down to the picture he had of his loved family. With him, Tomoyo, and their 6 year old son. Not the most perfect…

_But his most precious…_

He smiled gently before sitting himself on the cushion when the quarreling couple walked into his office.

"Mr. and Mrs. Hiyono, good evening. I'm Hiiragizawa Eriol, your marriage counselor. How may I help you?"

**End. **

A/n : And… there, the epilogue and the closing of 'Once and Again'. This is the story where I came up with the most versions first. I actually really like the idea of this story. My regret is that I couldn't pull out the real emotions of the characters and yeah… that I rushed it. Sorry for those who think that I just go over things again and again. I know I repeat things like Eriol-Tomoyo pull-push relationship, but I just got to do it for the sake of the story. And the airport delay…I did that to give lessons for Eriol. He couldn't just get Tomoyo after all he had done towards her, but supposedly his waiting worth it? -.

Lastly, thank you for sticking with this story until the very end. Thank you for all the reviews, compliments, critics, flames, anything.. Appreciate all of those. Love you guys.

Next project:

It is a story about Eriol and Tomoyo who were both broken-hearted and shared the same 'grudge'. Kaho as Eriol's ex. and Touya as Tomoyo's love interest were going out together. Albeit the dislike towards each other, Eriol and Tomoyo agreed to work together, to win back what they thought originally belonged to them.

Will post them after finished with the editing.

Till then,

Pinboo.


End file.
